Page 8 of Mending a Highland Heart

“Attracted to?” Charlotte felt her heart flutter and her face flush with heat. She had suddenly gone from aconfident woman, ready to respond to each of her friends’ remarks with finesse, to a speechless coward, unsure how to react.

Julia laughed at her friend’s reaction. “Ha! Can you not see it? Then you are a greater fool than I thought. Here I thought that Charlotte Andrews was the all-knower of men, and her powers were far greater than my own. Do you not know when a man is attracted to you?”

Charlotte scrunched her face up in thought. She was learning so much about herself on this isle. It was like she was nothing that she had ever thought. She was a completely different person. She spoke slowly, thinking about all of her interactions with Angus. “Well, he has always treated me with a cold sort of distance. I never dreamed that he would...I mean, I had tried, but he was so different...no you couldn’t be serious, Julia. Men, when they are attracted to a woman, fawn, and they preen, and they try to get you alone. But, this is not that.”

Julia burst into hearty laughter and laid her head back on the cushion, worn out from glee. “Oh, Charlotte, not that I know much of men, but I have learned what I could since living here. Men in London who are gentlemen are so full of themselves that they wish to make a show of their affection. But, here in the Highlands, where men are meant to be strong, capable, and devoid of emotion so that they can be good in battle, they may show their interest in different ways: anger, cold distance, arguments. Does that make sense?”

Charlotte shook her head. “Not at all.” But she could feel herself getting excited about the prospect that maybe Angus did find her beautiful and desired her.

“Well, all I ask is that you be patient with him. He is trying his best, and I know he is nervous about us leaving. Don’t trouble him too much.” She grinned at Charlotte, and Charlotte rolled her eyes.

“You should speak to him about not giving me trouble, you know. Why am I the only one being lectured?” Charlotte asked, with her hands in the air.

“Because you are much more in tune with your emotions and what to do with them. And you don’t have the weight of a clan on your shoulders.”

Charlotte nodded in understanding. I have only the weight of what to do with my life, she thought with fear. They spent the rest of their short time together laughing and talking about Julia’s trip, but then Julia needed to begin packing, and Charlotte left her, hugging her at the door.

“I wish you both a safe and pleasant journey. Don’t forget to write! As often as you can!”

“Of course!” Julia said. “There will be so much I’d like to know about what’s happening here.” Julia winked at Charlotte, and she began to back away, shaking her head.

“I do love you, but I shall not dignify that answer with a response, dear Julia. Goodbye! Enjoy the time with your rough Highland husband!” She wiggled her fingers at a laughing Julia and fled to her room to call for a maid to order a tray for dinner. She thought perhaps it might look strange if she was to eat in the Great Hall without Julia and Calum to be by her side as they ate.

She waited, sitting alone in front of her vanity, waiting for the maid to come so that she could send her instructions. But, when the maid arrived, she seemed surprised by Charlotte’s request.

“But, Miss, dinner is already served for ye. It is downstairs on the table. It was the expressed desire of the Laird and Lady that ye eat in the Hall.”

Charlotte stood up, confused. Why would they want that? Well, she didn’t want them to go to any extra trouble, so she replied, “I see. Well, I will be there. But, could you assist me in dressing?”

The maid nodded, and Charlotte pointed to a green gown nearby. She had been longing to wear it for so long, but there hadn’t been any chance to wear it in the wild hills of Scotland, as they lacked sorely in proper balls, so she decided a dinner alone would be the best time. She would have nothing to prove or show to anyone, and she could simply enjoy herself and think about tomorrow’s work.

The maid tightened her corset and removed the old gown, pulling the new pieces over her head. It fit Charlotte perfectly, and she smiled at the way the green highlighted the red in her hair perfectly. If ever she returned to London, she would have to wear more green.

She felt the lace at the square neckline with her fingertips and was pleased. It felt so good to wear nice things again. She completed the outfit with a thin layer of cream ribbon around her neck and had the maid deal with the savage mess her hair had become. Staying in a braid was not an option, even though she thought she looked rather fetching in an unconventional way.

She liked the way she could shirk her normal societal duties here in Duart Castle and get away with it. No one had said a word about her hairstyle. The maid pulled her hair back and pinned it behind her head so that her face was open. She looked like the perfect dinner guest for a Lord’s party. Dinner for one, she smiled at herself. It would be a lovely evening, free of everything and everyone. This could be one of her last nights of total freedom.

With one last look in the mirror, she wandered down from her room to the Hall. It was one of her favorite rooms in the whole of Duart Castle. It was large yet cozy in its own way. It was so very different from large meeting rooms in busy London, all paint and glass. But, this room, it was just itself with simple stone walls. It did not need to cover itself up with flair and flourish but could exist as what it was meant to be and be beautiful, giving people pleasure.

She looked down at her own gown. Perhaps she should take a lesson from the Great Hall of Duart Castle. She was always so used to flaunting her charms wherever she went. She did not know any other way to exist. A woman was meant to showcase her beauty, was she not? But was that all she was worth? Maybe according to her father and many men, but Charlotte was finding a different way.

She approached the main table to eat and saw it was filled with food and lit with candles. Surely this was enough to feed ten. She was merely one woman. She sat at one side of the table, feeling a little self-conscious of her lone presence in such a large room, even though she had been so excited about it. She hoped the servants wouldn’t be giggling at her behind her back.

She found a filled wine bottle to her right, filled her glass, and took a grateful sip, ready to enjoy her meal. But, then to her side, she heard a voice.

“Is nae a lady meant tae sit at one end of the table and a man another?” She turned to see Angus, bathed, and dressed in more finery than she had seen him wear before. Charlotte choked a little on her wine in surprise.

---