Page 66 of Chosen Road

“No, Momma. Minty fed us.”

He swung into the back seat and secured his belt, then stared out the window. After several minutes of silence, he asked, “Where am I sleeping tonight?”

“Anywhere you want, agori mou,” Amber answered, twisting around to look at him.

I watched him in the rearview mirror. He lay his head back on the seat and I thought I saw the telltale glisten of a tear.

“Are you worried about Yiayia, glykouli?” Amber asked.

“Sort of,” he answered, and this time I heard the tears in his voice. “I just want to be with both of you tonight.”

It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him we could do that when my mind flashed back to Amber on Thanksgiving, swallowing her feelings and composing her face. I squeezed her hand. “I think you need to make the decision for him tonight.”

She stiffened, then squeezed my hand back. “Whatever I say is fine? For everybody?”

“Yes,” I assured her.

“Then why don’t you stay at the condo with us. I’d go to the house with you guys, but I’m too tired to drive.”

My heart thudded hard in my chest. I cleared my throat. “I can do that. I need to go home and get a few things for work tomorrow, but then I’ll come back.”

“Can we all go together, Dad?”

“Yeah, we can go together, buddy.”

A little over an hour later, after driving through Dairy Queen for Blizzards, we filtered into Amber’s condo. Alex chose a movie and we settled on the couch like we had the last time I was there. Alex didn’t fall asleep this time, instead he asked to sleep between us in Amber’s bed.

I sat quietly, my elbows braced on my knees, not knowing how to help Amber navigate this. I wondered for a split second if my boy wasn’t trying to be manipulative, but one look at his anxious face reassured me.

“Gus,” Amber asked softly. “It’ll be a bit of a squeeze, but we can all fit if you want?”

“That sounds perfect actually,” I breathed. “Get ready for bed, son. Amber, I’ll get ready in the guest bathroom?”

She nodded and I scanned her face. She did not appear to feel cornered, only tired.

In the bed, Alex lay on his back, one hand on each of us. Within minutes, he fell into a deep sleep.

I looked at Amber over his head. “Hi,” I whispered. This used to be my favorite time of day, when Alex headed off to bed and I got my wife to myself for a few blissful minutes before sleep claimed us as well.

She smiled and turned on her side and whispered back. “Hi. Thank you for today.”

I grimaced. “You don’t need to thank me. I love her, too.” I hesitated, then decided to go for it. “Even if I didn’t, I love you. I’d do anything for you.”

“Will you be honest with me?”

“Even when it hurts,” I answered.

“How long have you been going over there for breakfast?”

I sighed. I hoped she wouldn’t be upset with her yiayia. “About ten months. She came to the house a couple of months after you left.” I smiled at the memory. “Scared the crap out of me. I opened the door after work, and she was perched on the couch like a tiny, wrathful, Greek goddess.”

Amber laughed softly and my heart warmed.

“She told me she expected me to visit her, told me she missed me.” I waited for her to say something. When she didn’t speak, I asked, “Does it bother you?”

“Um…” She thought about it. “The subterfuge bothers me, but honestly I’ve been so upset this whole time about you being alone that it’s almost a relief.”

“I wasn’t completely alone. I had Alex, the guys at the gym, I talked to my brother on the phone a couple of times a week, and I saw Yiayia once a week.” Her eyes scanned my face and I continued. “The truth is, without you I’m always alone, no matter who else is there.”

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