Page 94 of The Key to the Last House Before the Sea

‘I’d love to, Mum, but I’m due at Karl’s at six thirty for pre-loading before we meet the gang in The Smugglers. And we’ll grab a curry later.’

‘I… I didn’t realise you’d be out this evening,’ said Valerie, her heart sinking. Not only had she bought lamb, she’d also made bread pudding because she knew how much her son loved it. She’d end up comfort-eating the whole lot and putting on even more weight.

‘It’s Karl’s thirtieth and there’s a big celebration. I thought I’d told you.’

‘No,’ said Valerie, feeling stiff and wooden. ‘I’d have remembered if you had.’

She’d certainly have remembered that he was coming home for the first time in months for his friend’s birthday, rather than his father’s. He’d obviously rather spend time with his friends than his parents. Or his daughter, for that matter.

How on earth did Nessa put up with him for so long?The thought slid into Valerie’s mind and took her breath away. She looked again at her son, feeling as if she was seeing him for the first time.

Jacob was dressed in what looked like new clothes, with an expensive haircut and branded trainers, while Nessa was scraping together hand-me-downs for herself and worrying about putting a roof over their daughter’s head.

She was a good mother who cared about her child, thought Valerie, picking up a plate and scraping salad into the bin. In fact, Nessa cared so selflessly about Lily, she was willing to give her up. She’d agreed that Lily could move in with Valerie, even though Valerie could see that it would break her heart.

‘Do you pay maintenance for Lily?’ she asked, letting the lid close with a bang.

Jacob pouted. ‘Where did that come from? Of course I do, and it’s a fortune. Nessa really screwed me on that one.’

‘How much? And do you pay regularly?’

‘As regularly as I can. I might be a bit late sometimes.’

‘And even miss the occasional payment?’

Jacob’s face clouded over. ‘What’s Nessa been saying? It’s a private arrangement between the two of us and I can’t give her money I haven’t got. Has she been dissing me to everyone?’

Valerie shook her head. ‘No. She rarely says anything about you at all.’

And what she had said, Valerie had dismissed as untrue. But, she realised with a sickening lurch, Nessa was probably right. Jacob was only here this weekend to see his friends. He wasn’t bothered about catching up with his family, or seeing his daughter. So why would he bother about being on time with money to support his child?

‘It’s just as well Ness isn’t talking about me,’ said Jacob with a laugh that went right through her. ‘She can be a bit of a moaner.’

‘I wouldn’t blame her if she was. It’s not easy being a single mother, you know.’

‘I don’t need a lecture, Mum. I send money when I can. All right?’ countered Jacob, an unpleasant whine in his voice.

‘But “when you can” doesn’t pay the bills or the rent, does it?’

Jacob stared at his mother for a moment, as though deliberating whether to argue or not. Then he glanced at his watch, a new one by the look of it. Valerie hadn’t seen it before.

‘I’d better unpack and ring Karl to finalise plans for this evening. I’ll see you later, Mum.’ He walked over and kissed her on the head. ‘You worry too much, you know.’

He walked out of the kitchen, leaving Valerie standing by the sink. She looked out of the window, at the grass blowing in the breeze and the white-tipped waves in the distance on the grey sea.

She was such a fool. Her eyes filled with tears and she grabbed hold of the sink to steady herself. She loved Jacob. He was her son. But he wasn’t the perfect person she’d built him up to be. He could be, in Nessa’s words, a bit hopeless at times.

‘Poor Lily,’ said Valerie softly. Her father might not care enough about her, but at least she had a mother who cared enough for both parents.

And, thought Valerie, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, Lily had a grandmother who would always do what was truly best for her precious grandchild.

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