Page 72 of The Key to the Last House Before the Sea

Gabriel shook his head. ‘God, no. I can’t imagine me as a dad.’

‘Why? Lily doesn’t always take to new people but she likes you. You’re good with her.’

Was he? Gabriel had felt increasingly comfortable with the five-year-old but he usually avoided children, much like his father, who’d never been much of a hands-on dad. He’d asked his mum once why she’d only had one child and her reply ‘we only needed one’ had reinforced the idea in his mind that the sole point of his existence was to take over the family firm.

‘What about you?’ he asked. ‘How long were you and Lily’s dad married?’ He raised an eyebrow at Nessa’s expression. ‘You were the one who started asking personal questions.’

Nessa laughed. ‘Fair enough. Jake and I were married for four years, much to Valerie’s horror. Quite why he wanted to get married I don’t know. He was brought up by a middle-class family, with lots of home comforts, but he likes to think of himself as a bit of a bad boy.’

Gabriel knew the type and they usually turned out to be idiots.

‘I think I was attracted, initially, to the fact that he didn’t care what anyone else thought,’ said Nessa, almost to herself, gazing into the fire. ‘That was so different from me at the time. But it turned out that being a free spirit and a hands-on dad didn’t go together. He said a kid would tie him down.’

‘That must have been hard. How long after Lily was born did you two split up?’

‘She was fourteen months old. He had a one-night stand with a woman called Gemma, then he did a runner and he’s been an intermittent father ever since.’

Definitely a dickhead,thought Gabriel, feeling his body tense. But he breathed out and spoke calmly. ‘At least his mother’s on your side.’

‘Do you think so?’ Nessa raked a hand through her hair. ‘She reckons her son walks on water and I’m the evil woman who tried to ensnare him before banishing him to the frozen North. But she does love Lily and she’s always wanted to be a part of her life. Alan, her husband, does too, though he doesn’t get so involved. I guess I’m lucky really.’

Lucky? Gabriel admired Nessa’s positivity in the face of the evidence. In reality, she was a single mum with a feckless ex-partner, no job and no home.

Nessa nudged a log that had fallen from the fireplace with her foot. ‘I’m pretty sure Valerie wants Lily to live with her long term. She thinks it would be for the best.’

‘Lily and you together?’

Nessa’s pretty eyes opened wide. ‘No! She only wants Lily. I don’t think that Valerie and I in the same house would work.’

‘You shouldn’t give Lily up,’ said Gabriel, raising his voice above the wind wailing outside.

‘No, I shouldn’t. Though sometimes, when things are going badly, I do wonder if she might be better off in Valerie’s lovely home.’ Nessa scrubbed at a tear that was trickling down her cheek.

‘A lovely house isn’t everything.’

‘That’s just as well if Lily does end up living here with me.’

Gabriel thought of the pristine house he grew up in. His father had employed a fierce housekeeper, along with the au pairs, and he’d been scared to play indoors in case something got broken. As for painting, that was definitely out of the question, with all the mess that it might entail.

‘Wherever you end up living,’ he told Nessa, ‘if Lily’s with you, she’ll be happy.’

‘Do you think so? That’s kind of you to say.’

‘I can be kind sometimes.’

‘Even to people like me?’ asked Nessa, pushing her hair behind her ears.

‘Especially to people like you.’

Gabriel was suddenly aware of his heart beating in his chest. And when Nessa smiled at him, with tears in her eyes, he found it hard to breathe. He shouldn’t be here, in this cottage full of ghosts, where the past and present seemed intertwined.

He was getting to his feet when a blast of wind blew the front door wide open. It crashed into the wall as debris from the storm swirled into the room and the candles spluttered out.

Nessa rushed from the fire to slam the door shut and almost stumbled on her way back to her chair. But Gabriel caught hold of her elbow and held her as she fell forward.

‘Oof, sorry.’ She’d ended up with her face against his chest. ‘Thanks for that.’

She took a step back but he was still holding on to her arms. He didn’t want to let her go.

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