And yet, I find myself longing for his snide comments and disgusted looks. Maybe then I could stop thinking about how much I want to fuck him and get back to dreaming about all the ways I can kill him in his sleep.
——
It’s been a reallylong week, one that feels like it’s dragged on forever. But today, today has taken the cake. I swear, both my classes felt like they went on forever and what should have been a short four hour shift atBrewersfelt more like four days. I kept looking at the clock expecting hours to have passed and being disappointed that it was only mere minutes.
I’m tired. Stressed out. Overwhelmed with school work. And honestly I’m pretty certain my current living situation is giving me stomach ulcers. I’ve never felt so knotted up before in my entire life.
Needless to say, I’m beyond glad it’s the weekend and that I don’t have to worry about going to classes again until Monday. I also don’t have to work again until Tuesday. Halle-freaking-lujah. Janice finally hired two new people, and after working seven doubles over the last couple of weeks, I guess she thought I deserved a few days off. Considering I was hired as a part-time employee that was only supposed to work four hours a day, three to four days a week, and have been working far more than that, I’d say she’s right.
And it couldn’t have come at a better time.
I’ve been working so much, as well as being distracted by other things, that I have seriously fallen behind on some of my school work. I’m hoping if I buckle down this weekend I can get it all done and off my plate.
Adjusting my bag on my shoulder, I’ve just reached our apartment and am about to stick the key in the lock when the apartment door swings open and a pretty brunette stumbles out, knocking into me as she does. She turns toward me as she fixes her top, which appears to have been put on backward.
“Oh shoot, sorry.” She pouts, accentuating the lipstick on her lips that is now smeared and smudged.
I don’t have to wonder why she’s here. I know why...
Fucking Atlas.
“Yeah, you better be.” I huff, taking my frustration out on her because let’s be real, who else am I going to take it out on? Atlas? That’s laughable.
Besides, she practically knocked me over.
“Geez.” She finally gets her shirt situated as Atlas appears in the open doorway, extending a clutch purse to her, his eyes widening when he catches sight of me.
“Barlow.” He seems surprised to see me. Though I can’t for the life of me figure out why. I do live here after all, do I not?
“If you’re going to insist on bringing home every wet pussy in the state of Washington, can you at least make sure they’re fully dressed before they’re stumbling out of our apartment? You may not care what the neighbors think, but given that this place is in my dad’s name, I do.” I shove past him, knocking my shoulder into his so hard that I wince at the pain that shoots down my arm the instant the contact is made.
“What the hell did she just say to me?” I faintly hear the girl say as Atlas ushers her into the hallway and pulls the door shut behind him.
Smart man.
At least he knows better than to let me have a go at her. Especially with the mood I’m in.
And while yes, I know it’s unfair to say such things about a girl who may very well be a very nice person, right now I can’t find a compassionate bone in my body. I’m pissed. Plain and simple.
No, I’m livid.
But it’s not her I’m mad at.
Hell, it’s not even him.
Nope, this anger is one hundred percent focused inward.
I’m the one that let my guard down. I’m the one that thought maybe there was more to Atlas than I gave him credit for.
I move through the apartment, dropping my heavy bag on the floor with a thud as I make my way down the hallway and into the bathroom.
Once alone, I take a few calming breaths as I stare at myself in the mirror, willing the tears swimming behind my eyes not to fall.
I should have known better.
He is who he is.
But deep down what I’m truly angry about is how hurt I feel knowing he was with another girl. Which is completely unfair and irrational, but there it is.