Page 92 of Force of Nature

Chapter Thirty-one

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The first couple dayshome aren’t as bad as I thought they might be. No one mentions Thad, though I’m not sure if that’s because of me or simply because there hasn’t been a reason to bring him up.

According to Chris, everyone knows we were an item though he never confirmed exactly how they found out. My guess is my mom. I saw the way she was always watching me and Thad.

As Brad predicted, I was only home a day before she forced the entire family to sit down for a huge dinner in celebration of my return. I tried to tell her not to go through the trouble considering we have to do it again next week for Thanksgiving but she was having none of it.

I have to admit, having us all together again was pretty amazing. And while I missed looking across the table and seeing Thad there, it didn’t completely spoil it either. I laughed at my brothers, shared pie with my dad, and helped my mom with dishes afterward. All of which felt good to do.

It’s funny, every time something happens I feel the need to hide from my family when they are the only people in the entire world that makes me feel like me.

“Thinking of taking her out for a ride?” I’m standing in front of Cocoa’s stall when my father walks up behind me.

“That depends, you interested in coming with me?” I ask, having not been on a ride with my father since I was a teenager.

He looks down at the toolbox in his hand and back to me.

“Why not?” He shrugs, setting the metal box off to the side.

“Really?” I question, knowing how rare it is for my father to walk away from work that needs done to do anything of leisure.

“Yeah.” He grins, clearly seeing my surprise. “Why don’t you get her saddled up?” He points to my horse. “I’ll go get Sheldon from the field. He hasn’t been taken on a ride in quite some time.”

Just like that, the mention of Thad’s horse brings back the hollow feeling in my chest that I get anytime I think of him. Determined not to let it deflate my good mood, I force a smile and nod, leading Cocoa from her stall.

Less than twenty minutes later, my father and I are riding side by side through the open field. The temperature is unseasonably warm making for a beautiful November day. It won’t be long before winter is upon us and it will be too cold to take rides like these.

We talk about Blood Lust, about what my father and brothers have been working on to winterize the ranch, about the new horse my dad is thinking about buying in the spring.

Time seems to slip away and before I know it we’ve ridden all the way out to one of my favorite spots on the ranch; a drop off that gives the most perfect view of the mountains in the distance.

Enjoying the incredible view, the sun on my face, the freedom I feel being all the way out here, when my father broaches a subject I never saw coming.

“Did you know that I left the ranch once?” he says, pulling my gaze to where he’s sitting on top of Sheldon next to me.

“What?” I question.

“When I was twenty-one.” He nods. “I got it into my head that I was more than just a third generation rancher. I wanted to get out and see the world. My father was furious but what could he do? I was an adult and if I wanted to leave he couldn’t stop me.”

“How long were you gone?”

“About a year. Just long enough to get mixed in with the wrong crowd. I drank too much, did a lot of things I’m not proud of. It was right around that time that I met your mother.”

“I thought you and mom met at the market,” I say, cocking a brow at my father.

“We may have dressed the story up a little for you kids.” He winks. “Truth is we met at a bar. It wasn’t your mother’s scene. She was so pure and innocent. The most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She grew up in the next town over and was there with a couple of her friends. I swear one look at her and I knew instantly the kind of man I wanted to be. A man worthy of her love.” He smiles at the memory. “We spent the whole night talking and by the end of it I was a goner. I went back to my friend’s house that I’d been staying at, packed all my stuff, and moved back here the next morning.”

“Wow.” I smile, trying to envision the younger version of my father.

“I guess when you know you know.” He shrugs.

“I guess so.” I turn my gaze back out to the mountains, my mind instantly going to Thad.

“The reason I’m telling you this is because I want you to understand something. We’re not always the people we start out as. Sometimes it takes meeting the right person to push us toward who we were always meant to be.”

I glance toward my father. My broad shouldered, worn hands, hard working as they come Dad. The man who gave me life. Who kissed my boo boos and made everything better. Who held my hand the first day of kindergarten. Who taught me how to ride a horse. I look at him, looking at me, and in that moment I know what he’s trying to say before he even says it.