Page 81 of Bittersweet Addiction

I chuckle, hearing my words thrown back at me. She lets her arms fall and moves back towards me, sitting on the table in front of me and putting my hands in hers. She brings them to her lips and then puts them over her heart.

I don’t like where this is going.

“I love you. So incredibly much,” she starts. “You came into my life like a tornado…stirring up things inside of me that I had never felt. You challenge me and push me and love me harder than anyone ever has.I love youharder than anyone I ever have. But we just jumped feet first into this without really getting to know each other. Without really building a connection outside of our affair.”

“Charlotte…”

“I think I should stay with Lauren for now.”

Panic blooms in my chest. “What? You’re leaving me?”

“No! I just…”

No. She can’t go. She swore we were in this together.

You didn’t act like you were, why should she?

I ignore the thoughts. “You’re leaving me, when I need you?”

“That’s not fair.” Her eyes are full of tears as they slide down her cheeks. “I will always be there for you.” Her hand reaches out to stroke my cheek. “I love you.”

“Then why are you leaving? How can you leave?”

“Because I can’t set myself on fire…just to keep you warm.”

The words are a bitter pill. I know the sentiment; I’d spoken them to some couples. But hearing her think she has to do that for me… “That’s bullshit.”

“Will, there are almost twenty bottles of liquor—hardliquor—in that box. This is something you struggle with, and I just want you to get a handle on it before I further complicate your life.”

“You’re not a complication.”Baby, you’re everything.

“You just got suspended over my involvement in your life.”

“Yes, and your response to that is to run?” My heart hammers in my chest, as I speak the words.I can’t lose her.

“I’m not running! I want to give you space.”

You’re the last person I want space from.

Don’t let her leave. If she walks out of that door, you’ll lose her forever.“I don’t want space.”

“Fine. MaybeIneed the space.”

Well, that certainly changes things…“Wh—what? Space from… me?”

She swallows and fidgets in her lap. “I took a test.”

My eyes furrow together for a moment, not knowing what she means when realization dawns on me.A test…Her eyes look up to meet mine and they’re watery and full of worry. “Like a…pregnancy test?”

“Like a pregnancy test.”

“And?”Well, she’s not telling you she’s leaving because the test is negative.

“I’m pregnant…” she says. “We are pregnant.”

I don’t say anything at first, unsure of how she feels.How I should feel…

“A…baby?” I choke out.

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