Page 51 of Knot All Is Lost: Part 1

“You think I’m pretty?” I blurted, then slapped my hands over my mouth embarrassed at my outburst.

Spencer crawled over, closing the space between us until I was sitting between his knees, his body leaning over me. He reached out and gently tugged my hands away so he could see my face, running a finger along my jawline.

“You, my sweet Dove, are gorgeous inside and out,” he whispered, leaning in to brush his nose along the shell of my ear. “Do you want to know a secret?”

I tried to say yes but it came out more like a squeak than a word, but Spencer took it as agreement.

“When I’m with them, I picture you there too,” he shared, his lips brushing my cheek, sending a shiver through my body. “You’ve already stolen a piece of my heart, Cambrie, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

When he finished speaking his lips hovered over mine. Hesitating, almost unsure if I wanted him to kiss me when I wanted nothing more in the world than to know what his lips felt like. After my kiss with Oscar it’s almost as if a switch had been flipped and I wanted to know more—feel everything these men had to offer. When he still didn’t make his move I decided for him and went for it.

I might have been a little overzealous as I slammed my mouth to his, knocking him back slightly, but it didn’t slow him down for long. Wrapping his arms around me he fell back pulling me on top of him as he slid a hand into my hair and the other landed on my butt keeping me from falling off him. The combination of his coconut and my spicy nutmeg permeated the air as our scents blended as he tasted my lips.

Spencer was in no hurry as he moved his lips against mine tilting my head to allow him better access as I allowed him in. While Oscar had been powerful and assured in his kisses, Spencer was slow and methodical, almost as if he wanted to know every inch of my body. The hand on my butt grabbed tighter, pressing me against him as I felt something hardened under me. I’d studied anatomy, I knew the differences between men, women, and Alphas, but to feel it with only clothes between you was another matter.

My hands fisted into his shirt as I fought against the urge to rub against him like a cat seeking out a person’s touch. Needing to change something I let my legs fall to the sides so I was straddling Spencer, my pelvis pressing tighter against him. A moan escaped him as he bucked under me.

“God almighty,” Spencer groaned as he hugged me firmly and ground into me. “You feel so good, Dove. I love the way you respond, molding to my body like you were meant to be there.”

A knock came at the door. “Spencer? Sweetheart? Everything alright in there?” Nixon called.

“Come on in, Alpha,” Spencer answered, clearly not intending for us to move as he stopped me from sliding off. “No, Dove, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Neither of us are doing anything wrong, and trust me when I say Nixon is about to be incredibly jealous.”

The bedroom door opened and a deep guttural groan could be heard. “Spencer, you naughty Beta, you knew exactly what I would be walking in on,” Nixon said, his voice lower and rougher than normal. “Fuck, Sweetheart, you’re perfuming like crazy, has my Prince been taking care of you?”

As he spoke I heard him coming closer until he stood next to us looking down, raw need glowing in his eyes. Spencer let his hand slip from my hair as he tucked it behind my ear so I could see the Alpha looming over us better. Peering up at him, I wasn’t sure how to respond to his question but I knew he wanted an answer.

“Spencer always takes good care of me,” I said, pushing up slightly on Spencer’s chest so I could sit up.

Spencer grunted as he grabbed my butt with both hands holding me still grinding against me. “Dove, you’re killing me.”

I gasped and looked down. “Did I hurt you? I’m sorry I should have been more careful. I don’t really know how to maneuver around a man whose penis is erect,” I stammered, trying to move off him, but he held me fast.

“Trust me you are not hurting me at all, Dove,” Spencer assured me as his breathing picked up. “I’m incredibly happy to keep my penis right where it is with you sitting on top of it.”

I looked up at Nixon to find his eyes laser focused on me, a low rumbling growl in his chest. “Tell me, Cambrie, what do you know about sex?”

My whole body flushed at his words as a mixture of embarrassment and arousal caused me to fill the air with even more of my scent. As an Omega, I would never be able to hide when I felt desire, a biological assurance that my need wouldn’t go unmet.

“I…” My mouth went dry and I had to swallow and lick my lips before I tried again. “I’ve read about it in books, seen pictures when studying, so I understand the basics.”

“Hmm, then I think it might be time for you to further your education,” Nixon suggested. “Would you like to show her a thing or two, my Prince?”

Spencer looked at Nixon then at me. “Only if you are comfortable with this, Dove. I don’t want you to feel we are rushing things or pushing you for more. What Nixon is asking won’t involve you, he means only for you to watch. While we won’t refuse you if you decide to interact, I need you to understand it’s not expected.” He paused to search my face. “Say the word right now and we will both leave and I’ll deal with him in our own space not intruding on yours.”

His words seemed to snap Nixon out of his Alpha induced need, shaking his head and taking a step back. “Holy shit, what am I doing?” He turned his back to me holding his head. “I’m so sorry Cambrie, your scent mixed with Spence’s nearly sent me into a rut. This shouldn’t be happening. I’m a horrible Alpha for even asking you what I just did, fuck!”

Nixon turned to rush out of the room and this time when I moved to follow Spencer helped me to my feet. “Nixon, wait,” I called, rushing after him, grabbing the back of his shirt. “Don’t leave please, I can’t let you walk away from me that upset.”

He stopped but refused to look at me, his body tense under my touch as if he was trying to keep himself from doing something he shouldn’t. “Cambrie, it’s not safe for me to be here right now,” he said his voice gruff with emotion. “I promised nothing would happen to you, that I would protect you and right now I think I need to protect you from me.”

My heart broke at the self loathing in his words, I walked around so I was facing him. His eyes were closed, hands balled into fists, body practically vibrating with the need to run.

“Nixon,” I said, reaching out to brush my hand over his. He flinched at my touch but I didn’t shy away, instead I wrapped my arms around him letting my head rest in the middle of his chest.

It felt like if I didn’t break through he would never trust himself around me again and I couldn’t let that happen. “Please don’t leave me,” I whispered. “You might not trust yourself but I trust you. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that you won’t keep that promise you made to me.”

His whole body shuddered as he hesitantly placed his arms around me, dropping his head so his nose was nestled in my hair. “I’m not always a strong man, Sweetheart, especially when it comes to something I want so desperately, like holding you in my arms. Seeing the man I love passionately making out with the woman I am falling for more and more each moment was everything I never knew I wanted.”

Hearing his words had me melting into him unable to resist him if I wanted to. “Will you stay with me tonight?” I leaned back looking into his shocked eyes. “Just to sleep, Spencer too, the three of us together. That’s what you wanted, right? Because that’s what I want too and someday it will be more than sleep, but for now I just don’t want you to leave.”

“Okay,” Nixon answered, pressing a sweet kiss to my lips before hugging me close. “I’m not going anywhere.”

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