Page 35 of Knot All Is Lost: Part 1

“Alright everyone we have pancakes!” Bodhi called as he burst through the kitchen door with two platters. “We have plain and chocolate chip to choose from. Cambi, which would you like?”

“Hmm, one of each I think. If the apple juice is super sweet I might not be ready for chocolate,” I said as he placed them both on my plate. “Just so you know these eggs are the best I’ve ever had. You’re a wonderful cook Bodhi.”

Bodhi flushed slightly and almost dropped one of the platters at my words. “Ah… thanks, Cambi. I try to help out where I can around here, and cooking is something I like to do.”

“Rafael is another who is skilled in the kitchen,” Marius pointed out. “He can make amazing Italian food, his homemade sauce is the best I’ve ever tasted.”

My eyes grew wide as I looked at the man giving Marius a knowing look. “You’re just saying that because you’d like me to make some and you know if Cambrie asks I would.”

“Oh, you don’t have to if you don’t want to or don’t like cooking. Maybe one night I can cook for you guys instead? I don’t know how to make a whole lot of things but I picked stuff up from cooking shows here and there. Although I’m a little out of practice,” I murmured to myself as I realized it had been two years since I cooked anything.

“Why don’t you help me, then?” Rafael offered. “Then the three hour job will be far less tedious.”

“Three hours? It must be really good if it takes that long to make. I would absolutely love to help you, and it will help me learn where things are in the kitchen,” I said, liking the idea more and more.

The guys passed around butter and syrup for the pancakes but I didn’t think they needed anything. When it got to the point where my stomach was so full if I ate another bite I might burst, I paused. There was still half a plate of food left, but I knew I couldn’t manage to eat it all. Why did I ask for two pancakes? Wiggling in my chair I tried to find a more comfortable position to sit as I forced the rest of the food down.

“Princess, are you feeling alright?” Marius asked, placing his hand on mine where it lay on the table.

Slowly I put another bite of pancake in my mouth and nodded as I chewed and chewed and chewed, hoping I could convince my body not to reject this next bite.

“Stop,” Marius barked.

My whole body froze as my hair stood on end with the command of an Alpha. My whine instinctively slipped out distressed that I’d done something to upset my Alpha.

A napkin covered hand appeared in front of me. “Spit it out.”

I glanced at him, eyes wide at his order. He wanted me to spit this chewed up food into this napkin?

“Don’t make me bark at you again, Cambrie. Spit the food out for me, please,” he instructed, his voice commanding but not harsh.

Embarrassment made me close my eyes as I leaned my head forward and released the ball of pancake I'd been holding onto. I knew he pulled his hand away but I couldn’t bring myself to face any of them so I kept my eyes shut and just sat there. He’d known, somehow Marius knew I couldn’t finish my plate and decided I didn’t even deserve the food I already had in my mouth.

Abruptly my chair was dragged until I was now sitting in front of Marius. He reached out and grasped my chin, and forced me to look at him even though I tried to struggle out of his hold. I didn’t want to look at him as he told me what I’d done wrong or that he was disappointed in me. My heart couldn’t take seeing that type of look on his face.

He didn’t give up but he wasn’t at all rough with me unlike everyone else in my life so far. “Princess, please be good for me.”

The croon in his voice had me surrendering and lifting my gaze to look at him. He cupped my face with his hands as he stroked my cheeks. I didn’t realize I’d started crying. I hadn’t dared shed a tear in over two years but now it seemed the waterworks happened in an instant.

“Will you please share with me why you were forcing yourself to eat when you were already full?” he asked.

I sniffed and licked my lip tasting the salt from my tears. “You don’t leave food on your plate. It’s a privilege to have a meal so you must eat everything you’re given.”

“I see,” he murmured, releasing me from his hold. “Then that would be our fault now wouldn’t it?”

My brow scrunched at that. “Why would it be your fault?”

“Nixon is the one who filled your plate with so many eggs and I added bacon, then we also encouraged the pancakes. You have been without regular meals for a long time and I’m sure that’s made your stomach a lot smaller. We served you what we would eat and that is far more than you could handle,” Marius explained. “Here in this house, we have different rules. When you are full, regardless of what’s left on your plate, you can be done eating. We like to have leftovers in the fridge since we all work at various times of the day. While we’d love to have family meals all the time it doesn’t always work out.”

I nodded with another sniffle unsure how to feel. Everything they did was the opposite of what I expected. Had my life been so different from everyone else's? Could it be that what I knew as normal wasn’t at all? Bodhi understood some things but even in what we understood about each other he had access to things I only dreamed about.

“Marius,” I whispered.

“Yes, Princess?”

“I think I’d really like a hug,” I said, leaning toward him, reaching out but he moved far faster scooping me up.

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