Page 36 of How To Woo A Wallflower

‘It was all right, I suppose.’ From him, this was tantamount to gushing praise.

‘Thank you for taking such good care of Izzy.’ When the adults had been out of earshot, he had chatted to the little girl non-stop and made her laugh. Such consideration hinted that a kind heart beat beneath Jim’s hard exterior. An undeniably badly bruised and battered one, but one which still cared. ‘It was so nice to see a smile on her face.’

‘Izzy’s all right.’ He stared out of the window. ‘That toff you brought was all right too, despite the plum lodged in his mouth.’

‘Jasper cannot help the world he was born into any more than you or I can.’

He scoffed at that. ‘It must be so hard to be born rich.’

‘Do not allow that aristocratic accent to fool you. Jasper is a working man, just like you. In fact, he owns that club over the road.’ She pointed to The Reprobates’, which was already a hive of activity in preparation for the night. He would be there soon—or was already there now because he usually stopped by in the afternoons to check on things—and she had no idea how to feel about that. Having Jasper within spitting distance after his insulting reaction yesterday was not something she was comfortable with.

Not yet at any rate.

Maybe in a day or two, once she had come to terms with his abrupt disgust, she would be more inclined to forgive him. Right now, she was angry and wounded at his lack of thought for her feelings. While she might be reconciled to his lack of romantic attraction to her—for she understood that she was hardly the catch of the day any longer thanks to her dratted leg—they were friends and he could have handled Izzy’s innocent question better than he had. Let them both down gentler.

His stomping to the pond furious that such a preposterous, unpalatable idea had been proposed in the first place had also stomped all over her brittle self-esteem. It had also rather negated his pretty compliments from only seconds before they were interrupted. Compliments which had meant the world until he ruined them all by being so offended.

Jim rolled his eyes. ‘As if he needs to work! The cost of his fancy boots alone is more than most honest folk earn in a year.’

‘Have you ever heard the phrase about not judging a book by its cover Jim?’ A phrase which Jasper could do with heeding himself! ‘Because those fancy boots and everything else he owns were all bought and paid for on the back of Lord Beaufort’s hard graft. He set up that club when his family ran out of money. Built it from the ground up. He earns every single penny he spends.’ Even while disappointed at the wretch, she clearly still felt the compunction to defend him. What a hopeless case she was. A total doormat. Grateful for his crumbs despite knowing inside she deserved the whole loaf.

Why, oh, why did she not have the wherewithal to have set little Izzy straight herself by stating that she wouldn’t marry the thoughtless devil if he was the last man on the planet!

That question had plagued her all night as she had tossed and turned and flagellated herself for her own stupidity. But no! Her usual proud bravado had deserted her. Instead, she had remained mute, gaping like an idiot while blushing like a beetroot, hoping he would drop the tiniest hint that she was growing on him in some small way which transcended the platonic.

Afterwards, pride alone forced her to pretend nothing untoward had happened whatsoever when they bade each other their overpolite goodbyes. Even though she was dying on the inside and left so self-conscious about her ugly limp and scars that she still wanted to cry or rage at the heavens for cursing her so.

What a pathetic fool she was!

Jim was silent for a moment while he watched the comings and goings at the front door of The Reprobates’, then he turned to her with the first smile he had ever offered her. ‘You fancy him, don’t you?’

‘I...er... I m-most certainly do not!’ A fresh blush crept up her neck and burned her cheeks as she stuttered that unconvincing response and Jim grinned.

‘Liar. You’ve taken a fancy to Lord Toff and it’s as plain as those red blotches all over your face.’ He touched one and made a sizzling noise before collapsing in a fit of the giggles.

Rather than deny it further and risk turning purple in the process, Hattie decided to brazen it out. ‘Go ahead, have fun at my expense. What would a ten-year-old know about such things anyway? You barely know me so have no clue what goes on inside my head. Or are you a mind reader now, Jim?’

‘It don’t take a psychic or a genius to work out what’s obvious. Any more than it takes one to notice that the pair of you are dancing around it and both pretending you don’t fancy one another.’

‘Oh, for goodness sake,’ Hattie huffed, exasperated as she stood and made a great show of neatening the corners of his already tidy bed. Trying not to be buoyed up that the child in the chair behind her thought there was hope after Jasper had practically shouted that he thought everyone had gone daft in the head to think he would ever marry her. Now she really was grabbing at straws if she was pinning fresh hope on the observations of a surly ten-year-old!

‘I think I should ask Dr Cribbs to check your head when he checks on your leg today as that clearly got knocked when the cart ran you over. Jasper and I are friends. Nothing more. In fact...’ The phrase ‘the lady doth protest too much’ sprang to mind and reminded her to shut her mouth before she hanged herself.

But she had already leaked too much for the canny Jim. ‘Just friends, are you? The sort of friends who have to bribe porters so they can sneak off to see each other in private. The sort who stare at each other longingly and weave daisies into one another’s hair.’ His finger slowly pointed to her ear and remembering the silly flower, Hattie blushed scarlet.

That was yet another thing she wished she had dealt with differently yesterday. Especially as she had forgotten it was there and gone home with it still tucked behind her ear, and then had to lie to her mother about how it came to be there. Worse, Hattie was still furious at herself that she had kept the thing. That she had been compelled to press that insignificant, wilted weed between the pages of the book on her nightstand and then continually reach for it all night and pathetically ponder if it might have meant something after all.

‘You are reading too much into nothing.’ Exactly as she was with that stupid daisy and Jasper’s compliments, or his readiness to continue finding ways to meet her. Or his disappointing nose kiss. How daft was she to fall for a man who was never going to return the sentiment?

‘Of course I am.’ His smug grin called her a liar too until it melted into something which looked a great deal like sympathy. ‘Although I understand why the pair of you have to pretend, as I don’t suppose it’s the done thing to be getting all lovey-dovey when his wife has only just died.’

‘She wasn’t his wife. She wasn’t even his—’ She clamped her jaws shut. ‘It is complicated.’

‘Clearly.’ He shook his head, smiling, and then it split into a grin as he leaned towards the window. ‘Talk of the devil... Seems like your fancy man has just arrived at work.’

‘He isn’t my fancy man.’ But she couldn’t stop herself from taking a peek at Jasper alighting from his curricle through the window and then dashing up the steps into his club. ‘And that is the end of this ridiculous conversation!’

And a rather decisive end to the last remnants of her futile hope, as Jasper knew she was in here. Even if he had failed to spot the Avondale carriage passing him on the road on its way home, she had told him she would be here today specifically at this time a good half an hour before he had weaved that daisy into her hair, yet he strode into his club without as much as a backwards glance at the infirmary. Which all suggested she was an out of sight, out of mind sort of friend, instead of one in the front and centre as he was for her.

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