Page 104 of Never Lasting (Never Blue)

Jude

Tali’s armsstretched over her head as she smiled up at me. Sweaty sheets tangled beneath her, wild hair like a halo around her. The sun shone through the cracks in her blinds, creating stripes of shadow and light on the T-shirt that covered her torso and the bare skin of her mile-long legs.

My heart lurched.

My head filled with the question I asked myself every time I saw her: how was I going to walk away tomorrow when we both had to get back to our responsibilities?

Each time was harder.

Each time she left, it felt like a portion of my soul went with her in her pocket.

As soon as we’d finished in the studio last night, I’d borrowed a car and driven down to Maryland. Tali hadn’t been expecting me, but when I slid into bed with her, she welcomed me with her entire body. It had only been a week since she’d come up to New York, but it felt like years.

“Why are you up there and not next to me?” she asked.

My knuckles brushed her cheeks. “I can look at you better from this angle.”

Her smile grew. She sat up and draped her legs over mine. “There. Now I can look at you too.” She skimmed my scruff with her fingertips. “What should we do for the rest of the day?”

“I have one day with you, Stripes. I have no desire to leave this room and share you with anyone else.”

“Then we won’t leave this room. I don’t want to share you either.” Her hand flattened on my cheek. “Tell me what got you here. Did something happen?”

“Nothing. Things are working in the studio. We had a good day, and I got to thinking that the last way I wanted to end it was alone. I begged one of the interns to let me borrow his car, and here I am.” I pulled her closer onto my lap and buried my face in her hair. Each and every time I held her, she filled my senses with home. “I liked slipping into bed with you and seeing your reaction. You didn’t get scared.”

Her fingers raked through my hair, tugging gently at the too-long ends. “You surprised me, but I knew it was you the second you touched me.”

When she hadn’t been startled by my presence last night, I’d wondered if she was used to a man who was not me slipping into her bed. But when she opened her eyes and sighed my name, I banished that evil thought straight to hell.

That wasn’t Tali.

That was my tired mind. My jealous heart.

“I have an idea of what we can do with our day.”

She laughed, tugging a little harder on my hair. “Oh, I bet you do.”

I brought my head up, smiling wide. “That too. But it’s something else.” I moved her off me so I could go to my small overnight bag and pull out a notebook. When I flipped to the page I wanted, I brought it to her. “I started a song. I want you to help me write it. It won’t go on this album, but maybe the next one.”

She wrapped her knuckles on her headboard. “Knock on wood, and I’d love to, but as you know, I’m not a songwriter.”

I reclaimed my spot next to her, leaning my back against her headboard. “What I know is you’ve never attempted to write a song. What I know is you love music and lyrics. What I know is I’ll love any words that come from you.”

Her head fell against my shoulder. “Just wait until I’m trying to find a rhyme for zebra.”

“Why is there a zebra in our song?” I asked.

“Because I’m a terrible songwriter, obviously.”

I pushed the notebook into her hands. “See what I’ve got. See if you can add to it.”

I’d written a verse a couple days ago after we’d gotten off the phone. She’d been telling me about the indie singer who she’d watched record her first album over the course of a week. Her excitement was tangible and infectious. But in the telling of her story, I heard the underlying questions.Why the hell have you been in New York for months? Will your album ever be finished? Will it measure up to the album that took a week to complete? Will it be worth giving up all our time together?

I had no good answers to those questions, so I wrote her a song instead.

You’re always miles away

When you should be closer than ever

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