Page 96 of Sing it, Sam

Sam reaches up and traces my jaw with his thumb. My heart rate picks up the pace. “And to think if it wasn’t for this stupid disease, I probably wouldn’t have met you. How’s that for a silver lining?”

“Gotta love ’em,” I say, and cluck my tongue.

Sam starts humming, low and soft, and sways his upper body ever so slightly from side to side. “I was lost inside my head, forgot about my plans, ’til a girl with cherry lips, came and took my hand,” he sings, and takes in a deep breath. “She breathed life into my bones, with her crazy big heart, da nah nah nah nah, I knew it from the start.” Sam goes back to humming, his brows drawing together.

My heart booms. “God, I love it when you sing,” I gush. “What’s that song?”

“Hmm, just a little something.”One of his originals?Sam pecks a kiss to my cheek.

“I hate to say this, Sam, because I don’t wanna leave, but I have to. I’ve got some things to do.” I look up to the ceiling as I recount my to-do list.

Bake cinnamon tea cake and choc chip cookies, Anzac cookies if I have enough oats in the pantry;

Chop fruit for the cheese platter; and

Make chocolate crackles.

“Like I said. Don’t go to too much trouble,” he says, dragging my head out of images of the train wreck that’ll soon be my kitchen.

I rise off the bed and scoop up my bag. “Shush. I heard you the first time.”

Sam curls his hand around my waist. “Can I walk you to the end of the corridor at least?” he asks, his eyes begging me to say yes.

A hundred times, yes.“That’s very gentlemanly of you.”

“My mother taught me well. It was just a matter of being able to.”

When we reach the doors to reception, I turn to face Sam. He releases the walker from his firm grip and gives it a gentle push to the side, straightening his back. Standing tall, Sam reaches out and curls his hand around my neck. He gives a forceful tug, and I bump into his chest. He cradles my face in his hands.

As he glances down at me with glistening eyes, I wonder how on earth I’m going to be able to watch him leave.

“I love you,” he says, his voice thick. “No matter what happens when I leave here, or what lies ahead. Know that I love you, Janie.”

I stand on tippy-toes and wrap my arms around him. Tears prick at my eyes as I bring my lips to his and kiss him with the same conviction he seemed to hold in his words.

“You have my heart, Sam,” I choke out. “I love you too.”

For a while we stand there, wrapped tight in each other’s arms.

With every tick of the clock, a little piece of me dies.