Chapter 1
RAVEN
Power Struggle
“THE LITTLE ANGEL spawn is a lot feistier than my boy,” Dante says, resting his big palm on the side of my stomach. He trails his fingers across my skin with the twins’ movements, chuckling as they each kick him.
Forcing myself to smile, I play with Dante’s hair, combing my fingers through the soft tresses. We’ve been sitting on the couch for hours with the TV blaring for background noise, but I haven’t been in the mood to watch.
I stare at the bulge shifting under my skin, the cooler spot a clear indication to me of which baby it is. I haven’t thought about names yet. I haven’t really thought about anything. I know my devils grow anxious, and my lack of feelings doesn’t help any, but I don’t know what else I can do. Faking the excitement is pointless. They know it’s not real, so they do their best to show it for me. If I allowed Dante to adhere his hands to my belly, he would. I never knew someone could be so obsessed. His waves of affection never grow old. I remember enjoying it even if I’m numb now.
My heart should swell with the thought of his adoration and love for the twins. I should be ecstatic by how thoughtful my devils are. Things like smiling only come out of habit now. I’m just a vessel to these two beings of power. An empty shell.
My time on the Mortal Plane is almost over. I can sense it deep in my bones. It’s as if each passing day will bring me closer to my soul, but with my soul comes an eternity without my devils. We’ve failed humanity. I’ve failed the men who love me. Who I know I love despite the absence left behind by Heaven’s bastard warriors.
“Come on, baby boy. Give Daddy a power kick. Show me your strength.” Dante pokes his fingers to my belly, trying to summon a reaction.
I tap his forehead. “You don’t even know if it’s a boy. Maybe she won’t respond because she’s female,” I say, patting the hotspot on the left side. I decided the less I know, the easier it would be when the time comes. If I think about those things, it’ll make it more real. I don’t want this to be real. I want this to be a dream that I can wake up from.
I should find comfort in knowing what my future entails, but knowing that the birth of my twins will end my life…it’s the worst thing in the world. How can I prepare to bring life into this world knowing that it will kill me? How can I prepare never to know my children? I can’t. I don’t like having this sort of knowledge. I thought I wanted to know everything about the universe, but some things are just best left to the unknown. It would make it easier.
“Tell that to Kase. He swears to the end of time that he can only produce a little dude. Our swimmers are definitely all male, and together, we’ve created a power in our image.” Dante leans in and presses his lips to my belly. “Isn’t that right, baby boy? You probably have two cocks and everything.”
I tip my head back and laugh out of pure exasperation. “You’re ridiculous.”
“I’m happy. Excited.” Dante’s face lights up with a smile, and he shifts closer and grasps my chin, guiding me to kiss him. “Your laughter helps. It sounded natural. I think the babies might be influencing you more. We’ve all noticed.”
The smile vanishes from my face, and I flick my eyes to stare at Dante. The diamond-shape of his pupils expands and retracts, and he rubs his thumb over my bottom lip.
He traces my jawline until he tucks my black hair behind my ear. “Have you realized it? We think that you’ve been so numb to protect yourself. Without your soul, it’s a bit harder, but these babies bring so much more. You just have to—”
“Stop, Dante. I don’t...I don’t want to feel anything. I prefer this. I know it bothers you that I’ve changed but look at me. Look at all of this. You’ve given up Hell, and things haven’t changed. We are no closer to finding answers. The only thing we are getting closer to is my end. If I feel it, it will destroy me. Heaven has done enough already. Just let me live.” With my words, a swell of unbidden emotions blasts through me, cracking the wall protecting me from myself. But they’re not my emotions. They belong to the power I carry inside me. The twins react to me, and it’s as if a part of their beings possesses mine. I can’t control it, and it forces me to feel things that I forgot.
Tears burn my eyes, and my mouth trembles, my whole body turning rigid. Fuck.
“Raven, hey. Pretty soul, look at me.” Dante cups my face, leaning in so close that he fills my vision. His fangs peek from beneath his lips, and he releases a soft hiss. “Don’t fight it. This is a good thing. If you can summon the strength to handle this, then maybe we can use it. The babies know a part of you is missing. I know they can feel it the same way we can. Let them in. Let them help you feel. If you do, we might be able to pinpoint where they’re keeping your soul.”
I blink a few times. The heat of my tears splashing my cheeks burns trails over my skin. “We’ve been looking for months. This isn’t going to be any different. I can’t have this kind of hope.”
Dante growls, his eyes flashing green. Scooping his arms under me, he flips me off the couch and bends me over his knee, managing to hold me just right, so I don’t lie on my stomach as he keeps me up with his arm under my boobs. I don’t even have a chance to react before he flips up my dress and spanks me hard on the ass. My whole body tenses with the sting, and I gasp. It’s been a while since he’s surprised me. He’s been far more gentle the last month or so since I look as if I’m about to pop now. My pregnancy feels a lot more real now that he can see it with my changing body.
“Don’t think I’ll go easy on you because you are carrying our babies. I need you to know that this isn’t hopeless. We will get through this, even if I have to break through Heaven’s protective shield, burn my fucking cock off in the process, and fly into that shithole paradise to get your soul. I’ll do whatever it takes. I mean it.” Dante swings his hand again, smacking my ass harder this time. “I’ll even kidnap Cassius, chain him beneath me, and ride him like a damn horse into the light to make it happen. He would deserve it. I bet he would even like it.”
I open and close my mouth, sucking in deep breaths as my body slackens with a wave of lust. This cute fucking bastard. I can’t believe this. It’s like he awakens something inside me, and I can’t ignore or deny it.
Pulling me across his lap, he forces me to hold myself up with my palms, and I squeeze my legs together as he sinks his fangs right into my ass cheek, biting me. My body buzzes with his actions, and I moan. Warmth pools between my legs, and Dante hums deep in his throat. I expect him to pull me back to his lap to fuck me, but instead, he gets to his feet and forces me on mine.
He towers over me, a drip of my blood splashing on his lips. “I think it’s time we prepare. I’ve just ensured that you can’t comfortably sit on your ass and watch TV now, so it’s time to let me take charge. I don’t want to ever hear you say this is pointless again. Do you understand? I love you, Raven. I need you to trust me and the rest of the devils to take care of you. I know everything has been a shitshow, but life is always a fucking shitshow. Eternity is always a fucking shitshow. We just need to adjust and evolve and make it our bitch.”
I can’t stop a smile from crossing my lips, my body still humming from his unexpected punishment. It gets me in a good way, and it takes everything in me not to tease him.
Fuck it. I’m not going to just ignore things I want to do any longer.
Shoving my hand into his chest, I push him back a foot to give myself room, twisting away from him. I peek over my shoulder as I lift up my dress and bow forward as far as I can before it turns uncomfortable with my pregnant belly. “I need you to take control of me. I’ve missed you like this. Come on, Dante. Show me who you are as a devil. I think your disconnection from Hell has made you soft. Where’s my sexy dominating man?”
His eyes flash green again, my words getting to him how I wanted. “Careful, pretty soul. I can still open the damn portal to Hell.”
“Then do it.” I shake my ass, nearly certain I look as if I’m waddling in place, but I don’t give a fuck. Dante’s never made me feel anything less than beautiful. “Open the portal and bring out one of those damn traitors. I’ll feel better if I can fuck something up.”