Page 1 of Can't Have Him

Chapter One

Olivia

Istare at my boyfriend in utter disbelief.

Well, I guess that isn’t totally accurate. I should say that I stare at myex-boyfriendin utter disbelief. Two seconds ago, we were together. And now, just like that, we’re not.

“What do you mean, it’s over?” I say. My voice is as full of anger as it is of hurt. Liam and I have been together for three years, since our freshman year. I thought we were going to be together forever. Not that we’d explicitly talked about getting married, but it sure seemed like that was the direction we were headed in.

But now, all of a sudden, the day before our senior year of college, he’s decided that he’s done with me.

“I’m really sorry, Olivia,” he says. “Believe me, the last three years have been amazing. But I think it will be best for both of us if we see what else is out there. Because what if we have even stronger connections with other people?”

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” I say. “You just want to sleep with other girls.”

Liam scoffs, as if that’s the absolute last thing on his mind. “Come on. It’s not like that.”

“Whatever, Liam,” I say. I can’t believe he’s doing this to me. Did our relationship mean nothing to him?

“I’m sorry, Olivia.”

“Yeah, you said that already,” I growl.

I grab my bag and get the hell out of his apartment.

* * *

I’ma mess walking back home, but I refuse to let myself break down in the middle of the street. I keep swallowing down the lump that keeps rising in my throat and blink back my tears. It’s an eight-block walk to my apartment and I’m close to losing it by the time I get there. Furiously, I unlock the front door of the building and run up the stairs to the apartment I share with my roommate, Emma.

Usually when I get home, Emma calls out a cheerful hello within seconds of my arrival. But there’s no greeting when I walk in the door, and when I peer into her bedroom, she’s not there.

At first, I’m relieved to have the place to myself. It frees me up to start sobbing with abandon. But once that huge initial wave of pain passes over me, I realize that what I really need right now is a friend.

I try calling Emma, but she doesn’t answer. A few seconds later, she sends me a text:Sorry can’t talk. Can I call you later?

I’m disappointed, but I type back,Yep. I don’t want to tell her about Liam over text, so that’s all I write.

I try to think of another friend I could call, but it hits me that I don’t feel close enough to any of them to go to them when I’m a mess like this. I guess I could call my mom, but…well, she’s never been the biggest Liam fan. I have a feeling that she’ll tell me it’s better off this way, and that’s not the kind of comfort I need right now.

Oh, screw it. I know what I’m going to do. I’m going to let alcohol cleanse away this awful day. Throwing my coat back on, I leave my apartment and head to a nearby bar. It’s pretty divey, but that’s exactly what I need right now. A cheap way to get drunk. And it’s the kind of place where people usually leave you alone.

Sliding onto a bar stool, I ask the bartender for a rum and coke and practically down half the drink as soon as he sets it in front of me.

Nearby, I hear someone say, “Bad day?”

I turn to my left and see a guy sitting a couple stools away from me. He’s looking at me with arched eyebrows and an expression that’s half amused and half concerned. And even though I’m in a bad place right now, that doesn’t stop me from feeling a pang in my chest—the dude is hot.

Not that it matters. As far as I’m concerned, I’m staying away from guys for the foreseeable future. Or I’m at least going to stay away from them until I can be a better judge of their character. I thought I was good at separating the jerks from the good guys, but today has shown me that I was dead wrong about that.

I realize I haven’t replied to the stranger who asked me if I was having a bad day. I don’t want to strike up a conversation right now. But I don’t want to be blatantly rude, either.

I look over at him and shrug. “Well, it wasn’t agoodday.”

“Sorry to hear that,” he says.

God, I’m so sick of hearing the wordsorry. I turn away from him, shaking my head. “Yeah. Everybody’s sorry today.”

“Well…if you need a stranger’s ear, I’d be happy to volunteer.”

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