Page 177 of Captivated By Danger

He chuckled. “Did you hear anything I said?”

“No. I am so sorry. How can you smell good in the heat? Goodness.”

We sat back down. “All I said was that I didn’t need a test because I know that’s my baby. I’ve never been so sure about anything. And honestly, Greysen, the way I feel about you, I wouldn’t care if the baby belonged to someone else. I want the baby’s mama, so the baby would be mine, regardless.”

I looked out at the ocean, blushing, before looking back at him. He twirled the rose in his hand with a smile on his face.

“Does that one come with a card… or a ring?”

“Okay, let’s relax a little. We have to learn to live together as a normal couple first, but this white rose symbolizes a new beginning.” He turned his chair toward me. “Greysen, I want to have a new beginning with you. I don’t care where. Here. There. The card explained it all and I’m willing to give up—”

“Diesel, I truly hate to cut you off because I am truly loving this outpour of affection you’re giving me, but you keep saying words likegive-upandnormal coupleand I must ask, what have I asked you to give up and what is a normal couple?”

He looked confused. “The lifestyle.”

I nearly choked on the spit in the back of my throat.

“Who said that! When did I ever say that!”

“I just thought that… shit, Grey, I don’t know what I thought. I mean, that night when you cried, and…” his shoulders dropped. “Can you tell me something? I don’t know what the hell I was thinking.”

I laughed. “You spent a month trying to figure out how to give up being a dominant man?”

He nodded slowly.

“Diesel, you are a dominant man. With a name like Diesel, you are supposed to be dominant. I would never ask you to give that up or change who you are. You’ve made me love that room. I even bought my own set of nipple clamps and anal beads. How could you think you could just make me squirt out my pussy from fucking my ass and think I would want to give that up? Huh? Are you crazy?”

“Good Lord.” He looked around. “It’s children around here. Your loud ass voice carries,” he said, making me laugh.

“I’m just saying. Shit. I just wanted you to be a little nicer. Granted, I know that you have to be strong in front of your peers, colleagues, and employees, but I was saying that you don’t have to be that way at home, with me. I want you to stay nasty, Diesel.”

“This shit crazy.” He shook his head. “I totally misread it. I thought you were just wanting to do it because I liked it and you liked me. I didn’t know that you’d liked it, liked it. You’ve really turned my life upside down, woman.”

I laughed so hard. “And what is this normal couple shit you keep talking about?”

“I was scouting permanent security companies for us because I want to give you my undivided attention on dates and shit. I was thinking of incorporating a date night every Friday.”

“Oh my gosh, Diesel. This is really what you’ve been doing for the last month.”

“Man.” He rubbed his hand down his head. “You just don’t know.”

“So, when did you find out about Rachel’s baby?”

“Like a couple days after you left my house.”

“Hold on. You let me leave New York, knowing that Rachel’s baby wasn’t yours. I left because New York seemed so small with the man I love preparing to be a father to another woman’s baby.”

“Grey, you and I both needed these breaks from each other. We both needed clear heads before we reached back out to each other. It was hard not to contact you and let you know about the baby, but I managed.”

“I guess that makes sense. I do have a clearer head, but I did cry for a while. A long while. Every day, I came out here and wrote in my journal. The first couple weeks, I cursed you out in my journal, like how could you be so fucking careless? How could I learn to be a stepmother to a child whose mother is going to hate me? I had so many thoughts, but as I continued to pray, fast a little, work out, and re-center my thoughts to me, my happiness, and what I wanted for my life, the entries to my journal got better, easier. I still cried a little though.”

“That’s all I wanted for you. The day you sat across from me negotiating that manual like a big girl, I knew then that you’d get here.”

I looked at him with my nose turned up. “Who do you think you are? Like, you really think you are some Dr. Love type, ew.” I laughed. “Ol’yeah, she got with me, and I helped her elevate her life and now she’s a better womanass man.”

He waved me out toward me and said, “But, are you not?”

I paused, trying to hide my smile. “Touché, but let me tell you—”

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