Page 15 of Captivated By Danger

She walked out of the room, leaving me alone with my raging thoughts.

“Breathe. Breathe,” I coached myself.

My leg started shaking. Every second the nurse was out of the room was agonizing. Fifteen minutes had gone by before the nurse and my OB came back in the room.

“How you doing, Greysen?” She asked as she pulled a pair of gloves from the box on the wall.

“I’m doing good.” I shifted in the bed. “Tired. Irritated. Annoyed.”

Nodding her head, she squirted more of the jelly stuff on my stomach, before picking up the probe, rubbing it all over my stomach. On the screen, I could see my baby, laying in the fetal position, making me smile. My OB looked at my nurse, slightly nodding her head.

“Dr. York. What… what’s going on?”

“Greysen…” She grabbed the stool and pulled it up next to my bed. “There is no heartbeat. I’m sorry to say that your baby has died.”

Shaking my head, I whispered. “No. I just felt my baby move this morning. All I had was a little pain in my side. No. Dr. York. Check again. Please! Check again, please!”

“Greysen. The nurse checked and I just double and triple-checked.”

“No!” I sobbed. “No!”

“There are some options for you that…”

Dr. York continued to talk while I sobbed louder and harder.

“Who came with her?”

The nurse shrugged her shoulders and shook her head before leaving the room.

“Greysen, calm down please. Please.”

Moments later, Elle appeared at the door with a sad look on her face.

“No, Elle! No.”

She walked over to me and grabbed my hands.

“Take me somewhere else, please! Take me somewhere else!” I cried.

“Greysen, there are a couple options for you right now. We can do a c-section and get the baby that way, or we can induce labor,” she spoke softly while I laid on Elle’s shoulder.

“You want… want me to deliver my dead baby?”

“Yes. Or we can do the c-section.”

Everything she was saying was coming out jumbled up.

“It’s going to be okay, Greysen. We’ll get through this.”

That statement made me think of Kyle. “Oh, Kyle. Someone has to call Kyle. My parents. Call my… oh God. Where is my phone?”

“Greysen, I’ll take care of all of that. Please calm down.”

“Okay, let’s get you upstairs, Grey, so we can get you prepped. And… we’ll take care of you.”

I nodded my head slowly.

The next several hours of my life went by in slow and fast motion simultaneously. They’d gotten me up to the baby ward, gowned, and hooked up to machines. Since I’d opted to deliver my baby, they induced labor. It happened quickly before I could even ask for an epidural. It was the worst pain in my life. The worst pain of my life and no matter how many breaths I took, it didn’t ease the pain or heartache. The doctor, Elle, and a couple nurses were surrounding me as I cried and pushed, pushed and cried until the head was out. I cried even harder when they’d congratulated me like my baby was breathing. The next big push, the baby was out, and the room was silent.

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