"And I'm guessing that you're a serial monogamist if you have such issues with the way I live. But despite that, you haven't found the right guy yet. You've done everything right, but your friends are the ones that keep getting engaged and married and you feel like you're slipping behind. I bet you have a checklist of all the things your dream guy would have. So the real problem is that you're too picky and maybe you're even avoiding falling in love a little because it would mean you have to give up control for one second. How off am I?"
"Completely off." She pulled her hand out of mine and folded her arms in front of her chest. She probably didn't realize that doing so really just pushed her boobs up. I looked back up at her face. She was blinking fast, like she was holding back tears.
Shit. I hadn't meant to upset her. I just didn't like when people judged me. So my reaction was to judge her back? Smooth.
"That's a shame," I quickly said. "Because if it was true, then it would mean we were both waiting for the right person to come along. Which means we could spend the weekend figuring out if we could be that for each other."
She laughed.
I liked her laugh a lot more than imminent tears. "Seriously, we could spend all weekend in bed really getting to know each other."
She laughed again. "As tempting as that is, I'm going to have to pass. I'm here to hang out with my friends, not to hook up with strangers. So how about you get these bracelets off of me and we can go our separate ways?"
That definitely wasn't going to happen. "Okay, beautiful. I'll distract Javier while you steal the cards."
"What?" She stopped right before we got to the front desk.
"Just follow my lead." I walked up to Javier and leaned against the counter. "Hey, Javier."
"What can I do for you, Mr. Hunter?"
"I was just wondering what your iguana policy is?"
I saw Daphne put her hand over her mouth out of the corner of my eye.
"Our iguana policy?" Javier asked.
"Yeah."
"Um...we don't usually allow pets on the premises."
"Right, right. But I just caught this iguana outside, and I'd really love to keep it."
"Well, how big is it?"
"Oh, it's really big. The biggest one I've ever seen."
Daphne laughed and then immediately clasped her hands over her mouth again.
Javier turned around, but Daphne had just ducked. He looked back at me. "If you want I can call the manager to see if..."
"No! I mean, no that's okay."
Daphne had just reached her hand toward the stack of cards which was sitting right by the phone.
"So, you don't want to keep the iguana?" Javier asked.
Daphne successfully grabbed a stack of cards.
"Nope, I've changed my mind. I'll just kill it." I tapped the counter and went to go follow her.
"Mr. Hunter, killing animals in this rainforest is illegal. Mr. Hunter!" Javier called after me.
But I was already running up to Daphne. I quickly grabbed the cards out of her hand before she got a chance to swipe any of them over her bracelets.
"What the heck! Those are mine!"
I lifted them up in the air so she couldn't reach. She tried to jump to grab them, but I just held them up even higher and enjoyed the view of her tits bouncing.