Page 104 of Third Chances (Men of Manhattan 2)

He kissed the top of my head and started to run his hand up and down my back again. "I'm sorry too."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for. So you had a threesome right before we met? I'm not allowed to be mad about that."

"You're allowed to feel however you feel. It didn't mean anything though. It was just one of those stupid cards. I didn't know I'd be running into you. And if I could take it back, I would. I don't ever want to hurt you. Daphne, I really like you."

"I really like you too."

His smile was so endearing.

I wiped the remaining tears off my cheeks. "I didn't come to your room earlier to have sex with you."

"I kind of figured that." He smiled again. "But I'm glad it happened.

Me too. I shook my head. "But I shouldn't have let it. I'm not really in a place where I can be in a relationship. I'm still trying to figure out how to be happy on my own."

"Have you ever thought that maybe we can find happiness together?"

That's what I wanted. I really, really wanted that with him. I shook my head. "I can't."

"Because of your brother?"

"How do you know about my brother?"

"Alina told me."

I sighed. "She doesn't understand."

"I think she understands more than you give her credit for. But I'd like to hear about him from you."

"There's nothing to tell. He's gone. End of story."

"I know that isn't true. Tell me about him. Tell me what happened."

I looked down at the ground. "I loved him so much." I bit the inside of my cheek. I wasn't going to start crying again. "He was two years older than me. I looked up to him my whole life. He wanted to come here, you know? It was his dream to travel. He had posters of Costa Rica all over his room. And he had been saving up money so he could travel the world. He was so excited about it." This was too hard, talking about the good times. "But he was bad at holding a job. He was in and out of rehab a lot. It's strange, though, he always seemed good to me. He was good at hiding it from me, I guess. I think he was trying to protect me." I shrugged. "But he wasn't fine. He died of an overdose a year and a half ago. Right before my last semester of college."

"I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "And you were right, you know. I talked to him on the phone the night before it happened. He told me he had slipped up, but he said he was good. He promised he was okay. I always believed him. And I believed him then. If I had just looked at the signs, I would have seen it. If I wasn't so blinded by my own opinions of him, he'd still be alive."

"That's not true."

"Yes it is. I could have saved him."

"You couldn't have saved him."

"You didn't know him, Rob. You don't know the situation. I could have. It's my fault. I

was dumb enough to lose him, just like you said. And this stupid bracelet is all I have left of him."

"You're not dumb for believing him." He pressed my face against his chest. "That just shows how strong your love was."

I closed my eyes. "You know, I can't even remember what his laugh sounded like? It was contagious. Whenever I heard it, I'd laugh too. And now I can't remember it. That's what I miss the most."

He responded by rubbing his hand up and down my back.

"I know that James isn't Derek."

"Daphne, you don't have to apologize. I understand."

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