Page 10 of Single Girl Rules #ThreeHeadedMonster

I guided him back in and started again. It went okay for a second, but then Chad tried thrusting at completely the wrong time. So his dick fell out again.

“Just sit back and relax, sir. I’ll do all the work.”

I reached down to guide him in, but he was all soft and the condom was full of cum.

Well that’s disappointing. “Done so soon?” I asked.

“Yeah. I actually finished when you were on the sink. But I kept going to make sure I pleased you too.” He gave me a wink.

Say what now? “Handsome and thoughtful? That’s a rare combination.” He was handsome. And maybe thoughtful. But he was fucking terrible at sex.

“Sorry that the second position kinda sucked. I’ve always thought it looked fun, but the mechanics just don’t work.”

I shrugged. “You did your best. #WorstPositionEver.” Was it? I was pretty sure it was amazing. I’d need to try it out with a much bigger cock than Chad’s though. Where was Ghost when I needed him? Oh right, in the cargo hold for safekeeping. “Welcome to the mile-high club, sir.” I straightened his lapel and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Then I pulled on my outfit and left the bathroom.

“I’m no expert,” said Ash. “But that seemed fast.”

Slavanka shook her head. “So sad. Why you with him?”

“Eh. I’ve dumped him like ten times. But he doesn’t take no for an answer.”

Ash nearly spit out her very-watered-down banana juice. “Ten times?”

“Yeah. He’s very persistent. Which is actually one of his best qualities.”

“And that’s why you like him?” asked Ash. “I’m not buying that for one second. I’m pretty sure he secretly has a huge penis. Isn’t there a Single Girl Rule about being required by law to tell us if he does? Like uh…Single Girl Rule #35: Dick pics are literally everything. Or something like that?”

“Well, I agree with that statement. #Truth. But that’s not a rule.”

“Are you sure?” asked Ash.

“You were probably thinking of Rule #9: If you hear about a well-hung man, share the news.”

“Ah yeah, that’s the one. What’s #35 then?”

“If it’s been three dates and he hasn’t bought you something nice, move on. But now that you mention it, that rule kind of applies here. Because after the third time I dumped Chad, he bought me a pet giraffe to win me back.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. He’s one of the good ones.” I smiled towards the bathroom. “It doesn’t matter that his penis is so sad and small.”

“Really?” asked Ash. “Because based on literally everything I know about you, I would have thought that would be your #1 criteria.”

“No way. Chad is the perfect boyfriend. Other than Daddy, he’s the only man I’ve ever met who loves me for me. It’s hard to find a guy like that. It’s easy to find randos with big cocks to satisfy me sexually.”

“Speaking of being satisfied…what’s he still doing in the bathroom?”

“I’m not really sure. Something about needing to wash his junk five times after sex to make sure my lady fluids don’t irritate his delicate ball skin. Oh! Also, another thing I love about him is that he’s going place

s. Or at least…he’ll be going places if I can impress the guys in the Gryphon Club enough to take a chance on him.”

Chapter 4 - A Pure Display of Masculine Power and Agility

Saturday, Sept 14, 2013

“You guys ready to experience the greatest academic institution ever created?” asked Chad as Daddy’s fun jet taxied to a stop.

“Oh no,” I said. “Did the pilot accidentally take us back to the University of New Castle?”

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