Page 44 of This Is Love (The Light to My Darkness 3)

“Penny…”

“And it’s not just his projections. His hopes aren’t this high. That’s what matters here, James. He doesn’t believe. But Dr. Hughes does. I told him all about our case. He believes in Liam. He thinks he can make our baby better.”

“When you throw money at someone they’ll tell you whatever you want to hear!” I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. She blinked back tears. She was trying. She was caring. That’s all I had wanted from her in weeks. But moving Liam wasn’t the answer. This wasn’t what he needed. And what happened to being a team? We should have been making these decisions together. Before I told her what I thought, she started talking again.

“All of its already arranged. Everything’s already booked. Ian’s already agreed to come with us. I have to do this.”

“You barely know anything about Liam’s condition. You’re still healing yourself. I think we should stay here.”

“Then you can stay here.” She pulled her notebook to her chest as she stood. “Liam and I are going to Newark. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go pack.”

“Penny…” I reached out for her, but she dodged my touch. “You promised you wouldn’t leave me again.” My defense was weak. I knew that. But I wasn’t going to have her storm off angry with me. We had time to talk this through.

“I’m not leaving, James. I’m trying to save our son.” The emotion was gone from her voice. She sounded tired. And defeated.

“Then have a conversation with me for five minutes instead of shoving statistics down my throat. I’ve been dealing with this problem myself for the past few weeks. I’m used to making the decisions here.”

“Don’t throw that in my face. You think I’m not upset that I wasn’t there for him? It kills me. Why the hell do you think I’m doing this?”

I tried to take a slow breath. “If seeing Dr. Hughes is so important, we’ll fly him here. I don’t think Liam should be flying in a helicopter.”

She wiped beneath her eyes. “He can’t come here. I tried that.”

“Then we’ll find someone else.”

“But he’s the best. I’ve never cared about your money. I’ve never wanted fancy things. But in this one case I want to use it. This is all I’ll ever ask for. I want to save our son.”

“I do too. Of course that’s what I want. I just don’t know if this doctor is claiming the impossible. I’ve had other doctors come in to look at Liam. None of them have leapt to Dr. Hughes’ conclusions. I haven’t just been sitting here doing nothing. I’ve been doing my best.”

“I didn’t…” her voice trailed off. “That’s not what I meant, James. I know you’ve done everything you could.” She closed the distance between us. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” I grabbed one of her hands and squeezed it in mine. “I know that you wanted to be there for him. I didn’t mean to suggest other

wise.”

She nodded and locked eyes with me. “You know, I remember making a bet with you,” she said.

I raised my eyebrow. I knew exactly where this was going. She had won the fucking thing. And now she was cashing in. “I remember. You won.”

“Yeah, I won.” Her voice was shaky. “We had a baby boy.”

I tried to smile, but it felt like more of a grimace. I thought it was a girl. I really thought we’d have another girl. “You knew it all along.”

She nodded. “And I get whatever I want? In the whole world?”

“That was the deal.”

“I want Liam to live, James.” Her voice cracked. “I want to do whatever it takes for him to be okay.”

Her words broke my heart. “I don’t know how to give you that. It’s the one thing in the world I don’t know how to give you.”

She lifted up her notebook. “Dr. Hughes is a specialist that deals with the mental development of preemies. I’m telling you what I want here. I know what Liam needs. It doesn’t matter that I was unconscious for the first two weeks of his life. He grew in my belly for months. I know him. And Dr. Hughes can fix him.”

“Baby, we don’t know if he’ll live long enough for us to worry about his development.”

“Yes we do.” A tear fell down her cheek.

“We don’t.” I felt tears threatening to spill from my own eyes. I had heard all the numbers. I had done this same research. And I had done everything in my power to hold my family together. But I wasn’t strong enough. I needed her. She was the glue that held this family together. She was the strength I lacked. And maybe she did know the answers that I didn’t. Maybe she had found someone that could help Liam.

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