Page 12 of Crazy In Love (Secrets of Suburbi 3)

"Anything else I can help you with?" he asked with a smile that made it seem like he was on to me.

"I would like to buy one of those light-up reindeer in the display up front. The Rudolph one."

"The one with the red nose?"

What other reindeer has a red nose? "Yup. My husband will love it."

He didn't seem to react at all to the mention of my husband. Which was good. He wasn't interested in me or the case I was accidentally creating against myself.

"Great, I'll go grab you one and I'll meet you at the register."

I breathed a sigh of relief when he disappeared down the aisle. I'd never told him my name. I wasn't completely incompetent. But I had used my credit card when I'd checked out last time. He must have seen my name on my card. So maybe I was a little incompetent as a criminal. But it was my first time. And everyone made mistakes.

Detective Torres would never come here and question the staff. There was no reason for him to. And even if he did? The guy helping me probably wouldn't even be working. I winced when he met me at the register. He was wearing a manager badge. Crap. I memorized his name like he'd memorized mine. Don't mess with me, Jerry.

Jerry was a situation I might have to rectify at some point. But for now I was in the clear. After all, this guy didn't even seem positive that Rudolph had a red nose. Surely he'd forget about me by next week. I paid in cash this time so I would stop leaving a paper trail. I was getting better at this. Even the best criminals had a learning curve. Take Adeline Bell and Violet Clark. I watched my neighbors’ cases like a hawk, but they weren't necessarily role models. They both almost got caught. I wasn't planning on an almost.

I carried my bucket outside, humming Baby It's Cold Outside to myself. And I sang along to Christmas music the whole way home. I even hummed as I put on my wig and mask and walked into the basement with my new supplies.

I'd righted him before I left and made sure both his wrists were bound again. He was turned away from the pee on the floor like he was embarrassed, but he looked up at me as I walked toward him.

For a moment I expected a “welcome home.” But he was gagged.

"I’m in a Christmassy mood today," I said. "And I got a surprise for you at the store." I put my new purchases, minus the reindeer, in the corner and then placed the soapy bucket down and began sopping up the mess. His urine wasn't very pungent, fortunately for all of us. And he luckily hadn't rolled around in it when I tased him. It was a Christmas miracle.

I looked up at him after a few minutes of silent scrubbing. He was staring at the bleach I'd just placed in the corner.

"That's not your surprise," I said. "It's not for you at all, actually. It's for...dirt."

He didn't respond of course. But he did that thing with his eyebrows again. It seemed like he didn’t believe me. I never had been good at lying to my husband. Or reading him.

"It works for other things too, I guess. There's some mold in the master shower grout. Or is it in the caulk? I never remember which goes where. Either way, I might spritz some in there later to get rid of the discoloration and kill all that bacteria. Good idea, don't you think?"

He tried to say something through his gag, but then stopped.

I started to hum again as I finished cleaning, humming louder whenever I had to ring out the sponge.

When his mess was finally cleaned up, I tossed the contaminated sponge into the bucket. "Let me go get that surprise," I said. "But first, close your eyes."

He just stared at me.

"Eyes closed. Don't make me blindfold you too."

This time he shut his eyes.

Good boy. I took the bucket back upstairs and dumped the soapy water out the back door and into the grass. Then I tossed the sponge in the trash and removed my rubber gloves with a snap and tossed them in the laundry room sink.

The reindeer took a little longer to assemble than I thought. But when I finally had it ready, I yelled down the stairs to make sure he still had his eyes closed.

I carried it down gracefully. No accidental slips or pushes. I plugged it in and the white lights lit up all over the reindeer's body and his nose shone red. I smiled. Happy captive, happy wife. Was that how that old saying went? "You can open your eyes," I said.

He looked from the reindeer to me and then back again.

I was expecting a smile or a thank you. But I needed to help him do that. I untied his gag and let it fall to his neck.

No words fell from his mouth though.

"Don't you like it?" I asked. "He glows." I pointed to his surprise.

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