Page 88 of Crazy In Love (Secrets of Suburbi 3)

I’m so sorry, Aiden.

Chapter 33

Monday

Once we were back in the warm car, I leaned over the center console and kissed him again. I kissed him until his lips started to go slack.

He leaned away from me. “Again?” He tried to lift his hand but couldn’t. “Why?” he asked.

“Because you’re A.”

A tear trickled down his left cheek. He tried to lift his hand to wipe it away, but he couldn’t. “I’m not A.”

Maybe. Maybe not. But it didn’t matter now. He was my get out of jail free card. And I had done too many terrible things not to use it. I leaned over and wiped his tear away with my thumb. “The evidence against you is shaky. They’ll hold you for a while. Maybe it’ll go to trial. But they’ll let you go. When they do, you can come find me. I’m not going to Mexico. I’ll be in Canada. This doesn’t have to be the end.”

“You’re fucking crazy.” His eyelids started to close.

He didn’t mean that. I couldn’t let him mean that. I’d fix this. I’d fix it for him.

“No. I’m not crazy.” I grabbed both sides of his face. “I’m crazy in love with you. And I need you to trust me. I’m going to get you out of this. I promise.” So many people had made me false promises. But I wasn’t like them. His last words to me weren’t going to be you’re fucking crazy. Not in a million years. “Do you hear me?” I shook his head. “I’ll be in Canada.”

His eyes closed. His chin dipped down to his chest as he finally fell asleep.

I wasn’t sure if he’d remember what I’d told him. I eyed the gun on the floor of the car. Aiden was a loose end now. But I wasn’t going to kill him, even if it had been my original plan. Framing him when I wasn’t positive that he was A was one thing. But killing him? I wasn’t a monster.

I put the car into drive. “You okay back there, Snuggle Muffins?”

He sighed.

“It’s okay.” I pulled the car back onto the road. “You were right. All we need is each other. We’re going to be okay.” My voice sounded shaky. I wanted to believe it. But it hurt.

The silence felt loud as I retraced our path back up I-95. But I couldn’t play cheery Christmas music right now. If anything came on about love, I might risk ruining everything. I kept glancing over at Aiden. He was snoring lightly. A soothing sound. I could still fall asleep in his arms every night. I could still… Stop.

I knew it was risky going back to my neighborhood. But the Christmas light competition was in full swing. There would be a million Mrs. Clauses roaming the streets during the party. I’d blend in just fine.

When I was only a few minutes away, I called Sally.

“Ensley? Is that you? I just saw Detective Torres leave your house. But when I knocked, no one answered. Is everything alright?”

I didn’t have time to answer her questions. “Can I still borrow your car?”

“Yes. Of course. I’m out rating the Christmas lights. But I left the keys in the ignition for you just in case. You’re all set.”

“Thank you.” I hung up before she could ask any more questions. Although, I had a few of my own. Who left keys in their ignition when there had been multiple serial killers in the neighborhood? Sally was more trusting than she was gossipy. And that was really saying something. “You almost ready, Snuggle Muffins?”

He sighed as I pulled into my neighborhood. I did a U-turn and parked the car to make it look like we’d been leaving the neighborhood. And I parked it over the curb to look like it stopped in a hurry. Snuggle Muffins hopped onto my lap and looked up at me.

“You can’t change your mind now, Snuggle Muffins. I’ve already drugged him.” I shooed him to the side as I lifted the backpack off the floor. I pulled Noah’s finger out of my bra and shoved it into the backpack. And then I pulled out Detective Torres’ phone. I didn’t have much time. It was important that I left it with Noah, but I still found myself dragging Detective Torres’ finger along the screen one more time.

I was missing something. What if Aiden really wasn’t A? I looked at Detective Torres’ emails again. His texts. His phone calls. I opened his map app to see if I could figure out if he’d visited Sophia Tremblay while he was in Canada. He’d only entered two Canadian addresses into his GPS. And neither of them was the address Aiden had given me for Sophia. I quickly wrote them down. I was out of time.

I shoved Detective Torres’ phone and finger into the backpack and then tossed it onto Aiden’s lap. A perfect pouch of evidence. Too nicely wrapped up. I knew that. And I truly did think he’d get out of jail eventually. But it would give me enough time to disappear.

The gun and Snuggle Muffins were all that I needed. I hope. I looked once more at Aiden. I’d waited so long for a knight in shining armor to save me. But I wasn’t a damsel in distress. I’d saved myself instead. I leaned over and placed a kiss on Aiden’s lips. This didn’t have to be goodbye. He could still find me one day. But it sure as hell felt like a goodbye. Like my heart cracked in half. But it could have been worse. I could have killed him.

I put the gun in my jacket pocket, grabbed Snuggle Muffins, and disappeared into the Christmas festivities.

None of my neighbors suspected a thing. They drank their spiked eggnog and rated each other’s Christmas lights like it was the most important thing in the world. This party was usually a perfect night. Fake smiles as we all silently judged each other. I hated suburbia. And yet…I loved it too. I loved that someone like me could hide in plain sight. Everyone’s smiles were fake. Mine just happened to hide something more sinister.

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