He put his elbows on the table and leaned forward slightly. "Then why are you trying so hard to keep us apart?" He was looking at me like he genuinely wanted to know. Like he wanted to know my darkest secrets that always seemed to be threatening to tear my happiness to shreds.
"I've heard the rumors. About you being a player."
"Do you always believe everything you hear?"
I took a bite of my ice cream. "No, usually not. But when I've heard it from multiple sources...it makes it seem more likely to be true."
"Sources? Am I under investigation?" He flashed me the smile that made my knees feel weak.
"No. I'm just curious if it's true."
"Well, the short answer would be yes."
"So you only have one night stands?"
"That's one way to put it." He suddenly looked sad. He pushed some of the ice cream around with his spoon.
"How would you put it?"
He looked back up at me. "That's the long answer."
"I think I'd like to hear that one."
"Honestly, I don't see any reason to pretend that something could be more than what it is. Because for my whole life, my heart has belonged to someone else. I couldn't commit to anyone knowing that I wasn't all in. A casual hookup can numb that pain, but that's all it ever was."
I took a bite of ice cream to prevent myself from speaking, because telling him the truth was on the tip of my tongue. I understood what he said. My life apart from him had been terribly lonely. I didn't blame him for trying to numb the pain. Somehow it was better than him having been in love with tons of other girls. I still had his heart. That's what he was saying. Kind of. I had to remind myself that I wasn't Summer Brooks anymore.
I dropped my spoon in my bowl. "Is that what you want with me? Just one night?"
"I'm so tired of living in the past. Especially when the present it so sweet." He leaned forward and wiped his thumb underneath of my lip, removing a tiny trace of ice cream. He proceeded to put the side of his thumb in his mouth.
If I thought a spoon had been sexy in my memories, this was a million times sexier. I crossed my legs under the table. "So you want to commit to me?" I wasn't sure why I was asking him these questions. This was just supposed to be one night of normalcy. But I had a feeling I wasn't going to be able to tear myself away from him so easily.
"I think I've been committed to you since I bumped into you at the Corner Diner."
"Because you thought I was her?"
"No." He reached out his hand and placed it on top of mine. "Because talking to you gave me this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that I haven't felt in years. Sadie." He rubbed his thumb along the back of my hand. "You feel it too, or else you wouldn't be
here right now. I think we should see where this thing takes us."
A normal girl would find fault in his logic. He had been in love with someone else his whole life. And suddenly he was just willing to throw it all away? But I wasn't a normal girl. I was the girl. The one he still loved and the one he wanted to be with now. Really, I was more focused on the fact that my hand fit perfectly in his, just like it had back then. He didn't need to explain anything to me. I was in love with him too. But I couldn't exactly break off my fake relationship with Eli. Especially when the whole purpose of said relationship was to keep Miles away. "Are you done?"
"What?"
I put my spoon in his bowl before he even realized what I was asking. He probably owed me a hundred bowls of ice cream. He couldn't possibly be upset by this.
A smile broke over his face. "Are you seriously stealing my ice cream?"
"What are you going to do about it?" I had this overwhelming urge to be tangled up with him in a sticky mess on the floor again.
He pushed his bowl into the middle of the table and leaned forward slightly. "Actually, I don't mind sharing with you."
I was pretty sure my heart was melting faster than the ice cream. The more we talked, the more we had both started leaning closer. I wondered if he was thinking about the kiss he promised me. Because I sure was.
I thought he might push the fact that I hadn't really responded to his proposal of giving this a shot. But he seemed content with the fact that I was willing to at least share a bowl with him. To us, that's what love was.
"How are your parents?" The words poured out of my mouth before I could stop them. "I mean, you know, what are they like?" I had thought a lot about his mom and dad over the years. In a lot of ways, they were the closest thing I had left to a family. I had been at his house almost as much as my own when I was a kid.