Page 24 of Made of Steel (Made of Steel 1)

They were pretty much exactly what I needed for waitressing. If they reminded me just a little of home, all the better. I thanked the sales associate when she handed me the box, and then I sat down outside the dressing room.

"What do you think?" Kins asked as I pulled the lid off the box.

I looked up. I had learned three things about Kins since we had met. She was an incorrigible flirt. She was one of the sweetest people I had ever known. And she was gorgeous in absolutely anything she wore. I bet she'd look good in a trash bag. The dress did hug her in all the right places though. "It looks great. What look are you going for exactly?"

"Sexy but chic."

"Maybe you want something slightly longer then? That looks like..."

"I'd put out on the first date?"

We both laughed.

"Seriously, though. This is more of a dress for our RA than for Patrick then. I'll set it aside." She disappeared back into the dressing room.

Poor Patrick. I didn't have a doubt in my mind that she'd be dating our sexy RA by the end of the week. He

was in serious trouble. I kicked off the flats I was wearing and slid my feet into the Converses. They were a perfect fit. I laced them up and stuck my feet out in front of me. They looked good with the jeans I'd have to keep wearing until the bruise on my knee faded. Hopefully they'd look good with shorts too. I couldn't wait until I could wear some of the clothes Mr. Crawford had given me. I set my feet back down on the ground.

For a long time I had wondered how Julie was. I wondered if she and Jacob ever said I love you to each other. Maybe they were still together. I'd never know. She had never contacted me after that night. She was right though. Love at first sight didn't exist. Whatever I had with Miles had been a lie. And I had never fallen in love again. For the longest time, I had been holding out hope that one day he would just appear back in my life. But I knew better than anyone that real life wasn't like that. Nothing was like a Disney movie.

I untied the shoes and put them back into the box. Even though I didn't really have the money to spend, the shoes made me smile. And they were comfortable. Apparently Sadie Davis didn't care if she was completely broke.

I tapped on the dressing room door. "How's it going in there, Kins?" She hadn't come out in a few minutes.

"Nothing that tops that dress yet. I'll be out in a few minutes."

Before I sat back down, I saw a dress on a hanger, waiting to go back out onto the floor. It was a royal blue sundress. There was no harm in trying it on as long as I didn't let Kins see me in it. I grabbed it and went into the dressing room next to hers.

I pulled off the sweatshirt that I was literally sweating in. The bruises on my neck did look a little more yellow than purple today. Maybe I'd be able to wear clothes I wasn't melting in by the end of the week. I shed my jeans and t-shirt too and stared at my reflection in the mirror. The scar on my stomach stood out on my pale skin. I ran my finger across the uneven skin. Some things didn't fade as easily.

I quickly changed back into my clothes. There was no point in even trying on the dress. It would have matched my eyes if I wasn't wearing colored contact lenses. But I was. My eyes were brown now, not blue. And I shouldn't have wanted to draw attention to myself by wearing a nice dress in the first place. I was supposed to be blending in.

It wasn't like the scar on my stomach was the only one I had. I'd never be taking my clothes off for a boy without a serious conversation of what the hell I'd been through. And that could never happen. The fact that it had even crossed my mind was stupid anyway. Eli and I had agreed to just be friends. Yes, he was handsome and sweet. He had to remain off limits though. Besides, what would a relationship with him even be like? He'd never know the real me.

I walked out of the changing room and hung the dress back up where I had found it. Even though Mr. Crawford said this was my fresh start, it still felt a lot like hiding to me. No matter how much I embraced my new life, I could never escape the physical scars. I'd be lucky if I could escape the emotional ones. The Sagitta necklace wasn't the only thing I had kept from my old life. I sat down in one of the chairs outside the dressing room and closed my eyes. Maybe I could figure out a way to explain the scars away. A car accident. People wouldn't ask questions about that. I just needed to avoid questions.

"What about this one?" Kins said.

I opened my eyes as she emerged from the dressing room and twirled in a circle. The loose skirt was definitely more casual but still sexy. I gave her two thumbs up.

"Awesome. Did you find some shoes?"

I lifted up the box.

"Are you sure you don't want to try anything on?"

I smiled. "Positive."

Chapter 16

Monday

I finished reading the article and exhaled. The bail hearing still hadn't happened yet. Don Roberts was in prison. I had just been imagining things. He wasn't here. No one was following me. I had needed the validation of the article. I had started to wonder if my mind was slipping. I had become good at pretending I was okay. Now I was worried that I was too good at make-believe. I bit the inside of my cheek. I wasn't crazy. It was just taking me time to adjust. Which was normal. Right?

I exhaled slowly. Mr. Crawford had sent me to New York City for a reason. I clicked out of the article and closed my laptop. I just needed to focus on the present. Really, I needed to finish unpacking. The first suitcase Mr. Crawford had given me basically had everything I'd ever need in it. There were so many clothes, toiletries, sheets, and even a computer for my classes. I hadn't even gotten around to going through the second one because I hadn't needed anything else. But I needed to stop by the bank tomorrow and the documents weren't in the first suitcase. I'd have to get the information to Joan tomorrow so that they could pay me.

Kins had just gone to the bathroom, so I had a few minutes where she wasn't looking over my shoulder. I pulled the second suitcase out from under my bed and unzipped it. When I lifted the lid, I almost started crying. I lifted up the sociology textbook that I wasn't sure I could afford and glanced back down at the rest of the books I needed for class. I wasn't supposed to call Mr. Crawford unless it was an emergency, but I was tempted to call so that I could thank him. This was too much.

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