Page 42 of Made of Steel (Made of Steel 1)

I needed his protection. I needed him and I couldn't tell him why. I couldn't tell him how much. "Can you just hold me?" I wiped the tears away with my fingertips.

"We really need to tell someone about this."

I shook my head and closed my eyes. "Please don't leave me." I couldn't bear to lose anyone else. "Can you please just stay a few more minutes." My voice was laced with desperation.

"I'm not going anywhere."

I felt the bed sag. I opened my eyes. He was sitting on the bed, being careful not to touch me. I shifted forward and collapsed into his waiting arms. He let me cry without asking any more questions. He let my salty tears drip down his chest. He held me until I had no more strength. But his arms around me made me feel like I could keep going. I had messed everything up. They were going to take me away from him.

"No one's going to hurt you anymore, Sadie." He ran his hand up and down my back.

I swallowed hard. I wanted to believe him. But I had never been able to hide for very long.

Chapter 24

Thursday

I woke in a tangle of limbs. His fingers on my skin. My cheek on his chest. I took a deep breath. He smelled like sunshine and citrus. It was probably his laundry detergent. But I could smell it on his skin. He smelled like happiness. I clung to him like he was the only thing in this world I needed. I wanted to stay like this forever. No questions. No worried looks. Just this feeling of security. It was more than that though. I lightly trailed my fingers down his six pack. He was a perfect human specimen. I had no idea what someone like him was doing with someone like me. He was whole. I was broken.

"Good morning," he whispered.

I lifted my face off his chest. "Good morning." No one should look as good as he did right after waking up.

He tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. I'm sorry about last night."

"You didn't do anything wrong." His brown eyes seemed to bore into my soul. "But I wish you would talk to me about what happened."

I propped myself up on my elbow and looked over his shoulder. Kins wasn't in her bed. The alarm clock on my nightstand read 9 am. "You missed your first class."

"I don't care about that. The only thing I care about right now is you. I'm just trying to understand, Sadie. But if you don't want to talk to me about this, maybe you can talk to someone else."

"You mean like a therapist?"

"Or someone else that you trust."

The only person I could talk to was Mr. Crawford. And if I talked to him, he'd take me away. "That's not why I don't want to talk about it. I do trust you." I sat up in my bed.

"Then talk to me."

"I need to keep the past in the past. I'm trying to live in the present. I just don't want to think about it." I can't think about it.

"Can I at least ask you one question? That's all I need. Because I don't know how I'm supposed to drop this if I don't know the answer."

"Okay."

"The person that did that to you. Are they here? Are they in New York?"

I shook my head.

"So that's from before you came here?"

I nodded.

He slowly sat up. "So you're safe now?"

Maybe? He had asked me three questions now. Not one. Mr. Crawford thought I was safe here. Eli knowing more would make me unsafe. Miles being here made me unsafe. "I'm safe," I lied. The truth was, I'd never truly be safe. Don would find me. He always found me.

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