Page 54 of The Young & the Sinner

Olivia

I wokewith a start and sat up in bed. Sweat coated my forehead, despite the coolness in the room from the running AC.

I looked up at the stars hanging on my ceiling, trying to get them to calm me down. Max put those stars up for me before I moved in because I used to be afraid of the dark. He told me they would help keep me safe from any nightmares I might have. I wonder whether it ever worked, because it was a nightmare that woke me up this time. A nightmare I couldn’t even remember. But who needed to remember a nightmare when my reality was just as scary?

My whole body ached, and a look in the mirror told me it was riddled with more bruises that I had ever received in my life. My thighs, my waist, my arms, my buttocks… and there was even a small hickey on my neck.

Lorenzo left his mark on me in every way possible.

And for the first time in a long time, I needed Max to fight away the monsters. I hadn’t asked him to slay those invisible monsters for me since I was ten, and now there was an even bigger one—and he was real and visible—and I could still see the way he had looked at me every time I closed my eyes.

Climbing out of bed, I moved out my room and headed straight for Max’s.

But the light in the guest bedroom stopped me in my tracks. The door was open just a crack, but not enough for me to see in.

Mason was still here?

I had thought he had left hours ago, but it had been pretty late by the time the police had escorted Lorenzo away, and Mason stayed behind to deal with any of the legal repercussion he might have after beating Lorenzo into a nearly unrecognizable pulp.

I wasn’t downstairs when it all went down, but I watched them wheel Lorenzo away in a waiting ambulance from my bedroom window.

I didn’t feel any hint of remorse for the obvious physical pain he was in. I didn’t feel anything toward him at that moment, though I had been sure at the time that the numbness would leave me soon enough and I would feel everything.

And I had been right. I woke up in pain—not just in my body, but everywhere.

And Mason was here, and all I could remember was how he had held me on my bedroom floor earlier.

I had felt… safe.

I pushed the door open without knocking, and Mason was in bed, reading a book. He looked up, and there was just something about the way he looked at me that I couldn’t get enough of.

“Can’t sleep?” I shook my head. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Again, I shook my head. “Can I stay here with you tonight?”

I knew what I was asking was reckless and inappropriate in every way possible, and I braced myself for his rejection, knowing it would hurt when he turned me away.

He didn’t say anything for a long while. Then he surprised me when he pulled the blanket back and indicated with his head that I should get in. I didn’t wait for him to change his mind. I practically ran into the bed, crawling over him to get to the side furthest away from the door.

Mason pulled the blanket up to my shoulders and I buried my face in the pillow, facing away from him.

Everything in this bed smelled like him.

I didn’t even realize I was shaking until he pulled me into his arms. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

I buried myself further in the blanket. “Will it always feel like this?”

Mason was quiet for a small heartbeat, and then he said, “No. It won’t always feel like this. But this feeling won’t go away so quickly either. That helplessness that you’re feeling right now? It’s important that you understand it’s nothing more than that. A feeling. You have more control than you think you do; I promise you that. And someday, it will be better. This experience doesn’t have to break you if you don’t let it. You can come out stronger than ever.”

I didn’t feel very strong.

I moved into a fetal position, hating how vulnerable I felt then, even with his arms around me. How could this not break me?

“You talk about this like you know. Like you… like you’ve experienced this before.

He paused. “I have.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Mason.”

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