Page 45 of The Young & the Sinner

I frowned. “I doubt you ever have to cope with anything.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because you’re so put together.”

“Who’s to say I’m not mess-up.”

I shook my head. “No way. I mean, look at you.” He radiated light from his every pore. He was calm and collected, charming and sincere, and there was just something about him that made me want to let him carry my burdens for me. Surely he could carry them without breaking a sweat with those strong, broad shoulders of his.

“Yes, look at me. I’ve sent more people to prison than I've saved. I’ve torn families apart without a hint of remorse, justifying my actions with the law. I have nightmares from a past I can’t escape, despite it happening over a decade ago. And there are times when I couldn’t even be near my brother because of the guilt pressing down on me.”

I looked at him in surprise. Feeling guilt would mean he did something to Max. What did he do? “I’m sure Max forgives you for whatever it was that you did.”

“Oh, he didn’t just forgive me. He was never mad in the first place.”

I moved my hand to his shoulder, because he looked like he could use a comforting touch. He looked down at my hand, and I debated whether or not I should remove it. Was it even appropriate to touch him like this? But before I could remove it, Mason covered my hand with his own, and I had never felt as small and fragile as I did then, when I looked at how his large, warm hand covered mine whole.

“I’m sorry. If you ever want to talk about it, you should know I’ve been told on several occasion that I’m a good listener.”

Mason’s lips curled upward in a small smile. “I believe it. But this isn’t why I told you all of these things tonight. I just want to let you know, it’s okay to feel a little lost, and there’s no shame in what you’re doing to cope with your fear of abandonment. No one is getting hurt over the way you’re coping. I may not know exactly what you’re going through, but I do know what’s it like to feel so… heavy.” Heavy was one way to describe it, I supposed.

“And if you ever feel like you want to do something different, you can always call me. I don’t care what time it is. We can talk about it until you don’t feel like checking up on Max.”

“Thanks, Mason.” I leaned over and did something daring. I kissed his cheek. And he didn’t move away. Electricity sparked where my lips touched his skin, and I wondered if he felt it. I moved back and couldn’t quite meet his eyes.

There were moments of silence after, and I wished I was able to read minds then, just to listen in on Mason’s thoughts. When I finished my dessert, Mason got out of his car and threw the garbage in a trash bin nearby before we took off for home in silence.

---