Page 39 of The Young & the Sinner

I could go back to sleep now that I knew Max was still here. I could put away my worries for another night. I yawned and my eyes watered. I wanted to go back to bed, but the floor suddenly felt too comfortable to leave.

Maybe if I stayed here for five more minutes?

“What are you doing out here?” a voiced asked softly.

I gasped and startled back, only to be block by the door. My eyes opened and I found Mason’s huge frame outlined in the darkness in front of me. Thank God I didn’t scream and wake the whole house.

“You were sitting so still in the dark, I thought you were a ghost. You almost scared me half to death.”

“Me? What about you? Don’t you know not to sneak up on people in the dark?”

“Speaking of which, what are you doing sitting in front of Max’s door in the dark?”

I was thankful that there wasn’t enough lighting here for Mason to make out my expression. “Nothing,” I said, looking down.

I thought maybe he would go back to his room and leave me alone, because no matter how you looked at it, it was still pretty weird that I was sitting out here alone. And I couldn’t very well explain the real reason.

But Mason didn’t walk away. Instead, he reached down for me. Too stunned to stop him, I let him pull me up until I was standing directly in front of him. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and moved me forward. I was too busy trying not to pass out to help him because… He. Was. Touching. Me.

Me!

Mason had never been so close to me before, and I let him lead me away in a daze until we reached the kitchen. He moved around, boiling some hot water and taking out two mugs from the cabinet and two bags of chamomile tea. He didn’t turn on the lights, but I didn’t think he needed to. The garden window just above the sink let in enough light from the streetlamp outside.

“You should sit down.”

“Oh, alright.” I took a seat on the bar stool by the island, looking outside to the empty dark street.

“Can’t sleep?” He asked, handing me a hot mug.

I shrugged. “Not really.”

He took the seat next to me, so close I could feel his body heat coming off him. I had the sudden urge to move closer and bury myself into him. I restrained myself, though, but just barely.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, not really. You would think I’m weird.”

“You don’t know that. Try me.”

“You really want to hear about my problems?”

“Yeah, Olivia. I do.”

I took a deep breath, not sure if I wanted to tell him. I had only ever discussed my abandonment issues with Dr Greene. Not even Lizzie knew how unstable I felt these days.

But how much better would it be if I told Mason? What if he looked at me differently after this? I didn’t want him to see nothing but my problems whenever he saw me.

Mason patiently waited for me to gather my thoughts as he quietly sipped on his hot tea next to me. Smoke was billowing from the cup and, even in the darkness, I could make out the swirls of it. Mason blew on the cup, making me lose focus. I looked back at him.

“Sometimes, I’m afraid Max will leave me in the middle of the night, like my mom did.”

He nodded in acknowledgement, but otherwise didn’t say anything. He didn’t look at me any differently than he had before. There wasn’t any sympathy in his eyes. Feeling brave, I told him everything. I told him about my dad leaving, about my mom’s last day with me before she left me with Max, about how normal she acted that day, as if she hadn’t been planning on leaving all along.

Looking back, I could see that it wasn’t a decision she made on the whim. Everything had already been planned out, starting with that first missed payment on the mortgage. Hell, she had been the one to encourage me to get a job. She did everything she could to make sure I wouldn’t need her anymore, and instead, I ended up clinging to Max like he was my lifeline. And perhaps, in a way, he was.

I also told Mason about how much I wished I didn’t miss them. Just admitting to such made me feel vulnerable. And I told him about my therapy sessions with Dr Greene, too.

By the time I finished, dawn was reaching the sky, and I knew Max would be up soon. Mason spoke very little during the whole conversation. He didn’t tell me I shouldn’t feel this way. He didn’t even try to convince me that Max wouldn’t leave.

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