Page 182 of The Young & the Sinner

“Good. I’m glad to hear that.”

“Thank you. You know we get to find out the sex of the baby on our next visit?”

“Really? What are you hoping for?”

“Sam wants a little girl. But I don’t really care, as long as our baby is healthy and happy.”

I rolled my eyes. “What is it with men wanting a daughter?”

“I think it’s so they can have a daddy’s girl.”

“A boy is just as good.”

“That’s true.”

“Especially if you raise them right.”

In one of those rare instances, I allowed myself to think about Lorenzo. I wondered what went wrong to turn him into a rapist. If I had a boy, I would raise him to love and protect women. I would raise a gentleman.

Lizzie patted the hand I had rested on the table. She must have known what I was thinking about, because when I looked up, her eyes were soft.

“Yes. If I end up having a son, we’ll raise him right. We’ll raise him to be a protector of women.”

I smiled, my eyes burning a little. “We will, won’t we?”

She nodded. “How are things going with you? Have you talked to Mason yet?” I shook my head. She sighed. “Avoiding your problem isn’t going to make it go away.”

“I know that,” I said defensively.

Lizzie pulled back and took me in.

It was my turn to sigh. “I’m just not ready to face him yet.”

“I know, Livie. I just… you look so sad. I just want you to be happy again.” Lizzie had adopted Mason’s nickname for me, and I didn’t know if I wanted to hear that name again or not.

I offered a small smile, but I didn’t say anything. I knew better than to believe my happiness revolved around Mason, but I seriously couldn’t see myself being happy unless I was in his arms. And yet, every time I thought about going to see him, the image of him and my mom wrapped in each other’s arms nearly made me sick.

I wasn’t ready.

“How are you and Sam?” I asked to change the subject.

She gave me a knowing look but allowed it. “Things are actually going well.”

“You sound surprised.”

“Perhaps I am. I thought it would take some time to get used to the fact that I would be a mom and a wife soon, but the thought doesn’t scare me as much as it used to. And Sam is sweet. Almost indulgent. And very protective.”

Her eyes went soft, and I was glad to see her happy.

My gaze went to the sparkling engagement ring she wore. It was simple and classic, a princess cut, and so Lizzie, I almost smiled. Sam obviously knew her well.

I was so worried when she told me she was getting married, but perhaps it could be a good thing. I didn’t know if she loved Sam or not, but if she didn’t, then maybe she could learn to love him.

We finished lunch pretty quickly, and parted ways to go to our separate classes.

By the time I got to my apartment building, the sky was drab and dreary, and I almost didn’t want to leave again. I had agreed to meet my dad at the coffee shop, though. We had been seeing each other once a week.

We were slowly, but surely, building a relationship again, but I didn’t think I could ever allow us to be as close as we were before.

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