Page 5 of Set in Stone

Chapter Four

Ember

August 16th…

My cell dings with yet another text from Adam asking me to contact him. Emotionally, I’m not ready, but I suck it up, mentally pull on my big girl panties, and take a deep breath. I need to remember this is about Adam and his family, not the destruction of my dreams.

I’ve never been good at faking it, yet I need to learn how to and fast because I’m about to put on a performance that’ll hopefully convince the man I’ve loved since we were six that he didn’t break my heart. Dialing his number, I take one more fortifying breath and get ready to lie my ass off.

“Ember, thank god. I didn’t think you’d call.”

“Sorry about that, I’ve been taking care of some things here since I was gone so long and getting ready to go back to school.” I know he’s not returning, and my initial plan had been the same, but now I can’t stay here. I need to put space between us, I just hope it isn’t too late to reverse my withdrawal. “And I figured the four of you needed time together, so I made myself scarce.” That sounded legit, right?

“I always want to see you, sparky. You know that. I, uh, just wanted to thank you for all your help, especially with Riley.” She gloms on to me when I’m at their house. “You mean the world to her.”Her,not me. “You free to come over? I think we need to talk.” No, we don’t. He said everything he needed to and more than I wanted to hear. I can’t take a repeat.

“I wish I could, Adam, but I have other plans tonight.” Such as sitting in my pjs and feeling sorry for myself. I need to be alone. Hell, might as well get used to it since that’s apparently how I’m going to remain.

“Oh,” he says, the disappointment easy to hear. Crap! Suck it up, Ember, and be a true best friend. If that’s all he wants from you, then that’s what you’ll give him. He needs you, whether he admits it or not. He just lost his parents. That’s nothing compared to your pain at his rejection. After mentally bitch slapping myself, I stop making this about me and focus on what’s best for him.

“You know what, it wasn’t anything important. It can wait. You want me to bring dinner?”

“Only if you want to.” That’s Adam speak for please, feed us, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

“Casseroled out already?”

“I have nightmares about them, Em. I can’t eat another one or I’ll go crazy. Don’t mistake me, they’re good and I appreciate the thought behind each dish, but there’s only so many of them we can take.”

“Your dad would run away screaming if your mom tried to feed him nothing but that.” We snort in sync, knowing Kenneth would’ve made a big joke about it, playing it up to make everyone laugh. And they would have.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Being you, giving me a happy memory to focus on, and for not writing me off after how I acted, to name a few things. I thought I was doing the right thing and instead, I hurt you because I’m an idiot. I’m sorry for that. I can’t do this without you. Please don’t make me.” And then he ends the call, which works out since words escape me following his confession.

Wow. I was not expecting that. He isn’t wrong. He did hurt me, yet my heart still yearns for him. If there’s even the slightest chance for more, I need to take it.

**Adam**

Hearing her voice, knowing she’s at least open to talking allows me the chance to take the first deep breath I’ve had since losing my parents. Are the two related? No, not at all, but I just breathe easier around Ember. I always have, which is ironic considering she steals it every time I see her.

I knew, in the deepest part of my heart, when those words came out of my mouth that day, when I called kissing her, finally tasting her, a mistake and made her leave, that I’d fucked up. The level of fuckery had to be the highest ever. Her face. God, the pain I saw there, caused by me no less. If I could’ve kicked my own ass, I would have. As it was, I’ve mentally berated myself since then, tortured by her expression over and over as punishment. I haven’t slept, her face haunting me whenever I close my eyes. I can’t eat either. My stomach can’t handle it.

I compounded it the next day by spewing that bullshit instead of telling her she’s my anchor, the thing that keeps me steady. When she left hours later, I knew I’d successfully pushed her away. Unfortunately, I’d done so by creating a rift that might never mend.

How can I claim to love her and then do that? My treatment was unfathomable and my dad would tell me this isn’t how a man behaves. And he’d be right, a realization that has me questioning my motives. What if my underlying intention wasn’t to protect Ember from this life, but to protect myself in case she didn’t choose it?

My sparky, a little fairy of a woman with a smile so bright it’s almost magical to those around her, terrifies me. The power she wields, the ability to bring me to my knees with just a look, to make life worth living.

If I were to lose that or if she were to take it away, I wouldn’t survive.

And now she’s coming over and my eyes are wide open. In more ways than one because wow, this house is a mess. My mom would be so upset if she saw the disarray we’ve allowed it to become. She believed in instilling respect for what we have and that means taking care of it.

As the oldest, I need to literally man up. My brothers and sister are depending on me, especially Camden and Riley due to their ages. Unfortunately, I can’t find my parents’ will. I know they have one, it’s just not with everything else as it should be. I’ll have to ask Mr. Boone, the family lawyer, about it when I call him regarding obtaining guardianship. I just assumed it would be a given I’d slide into that role as Franklin and Lily Stone, our paternal grandparents, can’t take on two teenagers. They’ve offered help however and whenever we need it, but constant care would be too much for them. I could tell it hurt them to admit that and I know if there was no other option they’d make it happen, but they don’t have to. I’m doing it.

There is no other family aside from our mom’s parents which isn’t even a last resort. It’s a no way in hell possibility. We’ve met them twice, and the last encounter was too many years ago to remember anything about it. Hell, mom hardly ever talked to or about them. From what I know, which is admittedly not much, they were not only neglectful, but also abusive, verbally and physically. And when mom met dad their senior year of high school and eloped the day after graduation, they threatened to turn him in for statutory rape if they didn’t receive adequate compensation. Dad and Mom knew he hadn’t done anything illegal as both were virgins on their wedding night, so they called her parents’ bluff and said they’d involve the police themselves if they didn’t leave them alone.

My parents then moved out of state, returning only when hers relocated halfway across the country. When we were younger, they’d offer apologies and claim to want a relationship with their only child, but eventually their true natures shone through and mom would cut all contact once again. She always gave them a chance, though. Her soft heart, which is where Nash gets it, unable to completely write them off.

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