Page 68 of Claiming His Virgin Princess

Ilsa had pushed him away, but how often had she been rejected? Once in her teens, then passed over for her brother, then recently spurned by a fiancé who’d chosen his lover over her. Of course she was wary.

‘Oh, sweetheart, if I’d known.’ He cupped her jaw, the better to meet her eyes. ‘Yes, I want children. But I want you more.’

It felt good, finally to admit it.

Was that hope shining in her eyes? Or the over-bright glitter of unshed tears?

It made him wish he’d told her last time they were together. But then the realisation had been new to him and he’d still been grappling with the implications. Plus he’d convinced himself Ilsa wasn’t ready for such a declaration.

‘Noah.’ Her voice was a husky whisper. ‘I...’ She shook her head. ‘You don’t have to choose now, do you? Now that I’m pregnant.’

The words pummelled him, opening up a yawning ache inside. How wary his lover was. How badly she’d been hurt to think that way. To imagine he’d choose a child over her.

Silently he cursed those in her past who’d made her doubt her intrinsic worth.

It felt like the most difficult thing he’d ever done, resisting the need to tug her closer. He settled for standing as he was, because nothing could make him pull back.

‘I can understand you thinking that, Ilsa,’ he said slowly. ‘I can understand it might take months, even years, for you to believe I care for you because you’re the one woman in the world I want to be with for ever.’

Noah sucked in a breath and forced himself to face the unthinkable. ‘Even if something happened to the child you’re carrying—toourchild—I’ll still need you.’

Though he prayed with every fibre of his being that their baby would be safe and healthy.

‘Even if you could never carry a baby, I’ll need you. There’s adoption. There are my siblings’ and cousins’ children we can spoil and help raise. There are plenty of kids whose lives we can help, even if they’re not technically ours.’

He breathed deep, willing her to believe him. ‘I can live without children, Ilsa. I can’t live without you. These last weeks have been torment. That’s why my mother welcomed you with open arms. She knows I’m a mess.’

Noah lifted both hands to Ilsa’s still face, gently holding her jaw, brushing her cheeks with his thumbs and feeling the tremulous pulse at her jaw. Did she tilt closer into his hold?

‘I love you, Ilsa. I’ve loved you from the first. Though it took a while to realise I’d joined the family club.’

‘Family club?’ she whispered.

He nodded, his soul shrinking as he read her doubt, her reluctance to believe him.

‘The Carsons fall in love early. All the adults find their life partner by their early twenties. We have a tradition of long, happy marriages.’

‘But not you.’

‘Not until now. I’d been waiting to meet you.’ That was how it felt. ‘With you it was like pieces of a puzzle finally falling into place. Even though I didn’t want to believe it initially. It was easier to pretend it was just lust, easily satisfied by a short affair.’

Because he’d doubted his own judgement after his mistake with Poppy. Looking back, he suspected he’d fallen in love with Ilsa that very first evening, but the defence mechanisms he’d erected and his own stubbornness had stopped him realising till it was almost too late.

Reluctantly Noah pulled his hands away, knowing he had to give her space. ‘But I understand I need to prove how I feel. You’ll need time to trust me.’

A ripple of emotion crossed Ilsa’s face and her mouth crumpled. ‘I want to trust you, Noah.’

‘I know, sweetheart. It’s okay. I can be patient. I’ll do whatever you need. You can stay in Sydney and see what life is like in Australia. There’s plenty of space here.’ He had a large home, too large for one person. ‘Or if you’d rather not, I’ll arrange somewhere else private for you. Or I’ll come to Europe and find out about your life there.’

He paused, knowing he was in danger of rushing her. ‘If you need more proof of my feelings, I’ll get my assistant to send you my flight arrangements for the end of this week. I’d planned a visit to Altbourg. Ostensibly it’s to scope that joint project. But in reality it was an excuse to see you.’

Her finger on his mouth stopped him. To Noah’s horror he saw tears brighten her beautiful eyes.

‘There’s no need to persuade me.’ Her soft words were like a bar clanging down on his hopes. Wouldn’t she even give him a chance to prove himself?

Then she smiled. It was strained and a little watery but so beautiful that his heart leapt.

‘I want to trust you because I love you too, Noah. I’ve loved you since Istanbul. No, before then. I’ve been miserable, thinking of how I treated you and how you must despise me.’

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