Page 29 of Awakened in September (Sleepless November Saga 4)

I can’t help but laugh as I take another swig of my drink, placing the cup down on my nightstand when I’m done. “Why shouldn’t I?”

“Holden, please.” She begs. “I can’t have this getting out. If my mother finds out she will send me to one of those awful places, or worse. I’ll lose my place here and I’ll have to become a stripper and my whole life will be ruined.”

Watching her rant is sort of adorable, until her breathing becomes labored and she slides down to sit on the floor. Her hand presses against her chest as she struggles. I lunge toward her, seeing all the tell-tale signs of an anxiety attack.

“Kayleigh, Kay, come on. Relax. Breathe.” I try, but nothing I say is getting through to her.

I take a bottle of water from my mini-fridge and hand it to her. She places it against her forehead and after a few long minutes, finally starts to gain control of her breathing again.

“I’m okay.” She murmurs once she’s calm. “Sorry.”

The corners of my mouth raise involuntarily. “You’re apologizing for having a panic attack?”

She giggles slightly before becoming serious again. “I can’t have anyone else finding out about this, Holden. I’m serious.”

My hands rub over my face. A very large part of me wants to tell someone and get her the help she needs. Yet, at the same time, I feel guilty for causing her to have another break down. I know it was hard for her to come here. This is just that important to her. One thing’s for sure, I can’t let her starve herself to death. There’s only one other solution I can think of, and I’m sure it won’t end well for me.

“Okay, I won’t say an

ything.” I tell her and watch as she visibly relaxes. “But I have one condition.”

“Okay. What?”

“I want to help you beat this.”

Chapter Ten

The beach is beautiful with the waves crashing against the shore. As the sun starts to rise above the sea, the wind runs through my hair. Suddenly, my mother is by my side. Her green eyes reflect in the light, reminding me what mine look like. Just being near her soothes me.

“I miss you.” I tell her honestly.

She turns her head toward me and sighs. “Oh, Holden. You don’t have to miss me. I’m with you every single day.”

“It’s not the same.”

I can feel the back of her hand as it rubs lightly against my cheek. “I know, honey, but your father and I are so proud of you. You’ve grown into a wonderful young man.”

“Thanks mom, but it doesn’t always feel that way.”

She looks back to the water, smiling at someone walking down the sand. I follow her gaze to see Kayleigh. She’s going along the shoreline with her bare feet dipped in the water. The white dress she’s wearing makes her look angelic. Just the sight of her creates a flutter in my stomach.

“She’s special to you.” My mother acknowledges.

I finally look away and nod. “She hates me though.”

“Only because she hasn’t seen the real you. No one has in a very long time, and no, Brandon doesn’t count.”

Despite wanting to tell her she’s wrong, I know she’s not. “It’s hard. I can’t go back to that place. I can’t lose someone I love again.”

“But darling, love is a marvelous thing. You can’t deny yourself of that simply because you’re afraid of getting hurt.”

“Trust me, allowing myself to feel anything for that girl is guaranteed to get me hurt.”

She lifts my head to look at her. I can see Kayleigh off in the distance, but my mother’s brown hair blowing in the breeze and the sunlight landing softly on her face is all I can concentrate on. She really was stunning.

“Be yourself with her, H. I promise, it will be the best thing you’ll ever do.”

A tear runs down my cheek. As I go to respond, a voice stops me. “Holden?” It’s Kayleigh, and hearing her say my name is like music to my ears. “Holden.” It sounds again, but this time it’s different.

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