Page 100 of Returning to Rockport

MCKENNA

How many times in your life are you really sure of what you want? At eighteen years old, I never thought I would be, but lying here with Colton, I’ve never been so sure of anything. I want him, bad. I don’t think there was ever a time where I didn’t, but I never allowed myself to think too far into it. Now, even the idea of him pushing himself inside of me has me squirming in anticipated ecstasy.

“Colton?” I whisper. His thumb rubs gently over my hip, telling me he’s listening. “I want you.”

The movement stops and his eyes snap open. “As in…”

“I want…” I stop and take a deep breath. If I’m going to be mature enough to do it, I have to be mature enough to say it. “I want you to fuck me.”

He studies my face, looking for any indication of being unsure. “Have you ever…” I shake my head. “And you want that with me? You trust me enough for that?”

“I trust you with my life.”

His lips part in a smile and then seal over my own. The kiss isn’t rushed or heated, it’s patient – like he’s making sure to savor every moment of this. I can feel him hardening in his jeans as he pulls me into him. It’s not the first time he’s gotten turned on around me, but it’s the first time I get have it stretching me open. Colton’s big, though it’s not like I have much to compare to. He’s thick enough for my jaw to hurt after blowing him for a few minutes, and there isn’t a chance in hell of him fitting entirely in my mouth. Imagining how the pain will feel is a bit intimidating, but there isn’t anything that could deter me now.

“Do you have a condom?” I murmur against his mouth.

He breaks the kiss and shakes his head. “I didn’t think I’d need one. You caught me a little off guard here, Princess.” I’m just about to pull my shirt back down when he perks up. “Give me one second.”

Colton gets up and heads out into the hallway. No one is home. My parents are at some work party, and Maverick is at his girlfriend’s for

the night. We have the house to ourselves, but the idea of him being anywhere but my room still makes me nervous. If we got caught…

He comes back in and pulls me from my anxious thoughts. The condom he holds up and the grin on his face, make me laugh. He comes closer and tosses it down on the nightstand, then climbs back onto the bed.

“You just stole that from Maverick’s room, didn’t you?”

“Yup.” He answers, popping the p.

I chuckle. “He would kill you if he found out why you took one.”

His shoulders shrug. “There isn’t anything about this that he wouldn’t kill me for.” He moves his lips to my neck and kisses softly. “Now, enough talking about your brother.”

I moan, breathless, as his hand slides under my waistband and grazes my clit. My hips arch up in search of his touch. I need it. I need him.

Colton removes my clothes the same way he kisses me, slowly and delicately, like too strong of a touch may break me. My hands shake as I unbutton his jeans. He takes them into his own and presses light a light kiss to one palm.

“Relax, baby.” He whispers.

The term of endearment causes butterflies to come to life in my belly. He slides his pants and boxers down his legs, leaving us both naked at last. I watch as he rips the condom open with his teeth and slips it over his cock. Just as I feel him at my entrance, he lifts my chin and forces me to look at him.

“You’re so beautiful, McKenna.”

I jolt awake and sit up instantly, tears soaking my cheeks. My hand covers my mouth in an attempt to mask the sobs, but it’s no use. I can already hear Parker stirring beside me. The hand he places on my back is meant to be comforting but it only makes things worse.

“Are you alright?” He questions tiredly.

“Fine.” I tell him, but the crack in my voice gives me away.

He sighs. “It was only a dream, love. Go back to sleep.”

A pain shoots through my chest and I find it hard to breathe. It wasn’t just a dream – it was a memory.

I’M SITTING ON MY couch, wrapped in the softest blanket I could find. It’s the only thing that brings me any sense of comfort lately. After the fight between Colton and Maverick, I waited another three days before I finally went back to my house. My mom was starting to get worried and I didn’t want to go into the details of everything that happened. The truth of the matter is, we all seemed to lose everything that day.

Parker had called and asked if we could get together and talk. He’s still hurt, obviously so, but he told me that he partially blames himself. He feels like if he hadn’t been so busy with med school, I wouldn’t have felt the need to stray. If I’m honest, I think it would have happened anyway, but the point is moot. I agreed to come home, and for the last week since I’ve been back, he’s been trying to be more attentive.

I’d be lying if I said I’m not still dealing with the pain of losing Colton. When the house is empty, which thankfully is often, I spend my days watching Netflix and crying over a tub of ice cream. It may not be the healthiest thing, but it’s all I can manage lately. Quitting that man cold turkey is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and now I’ve had to do it twice.

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