Page 104 of Queen of Anarchy (Dirty Broken Savages 2)

38

River

I wakeup the next morning in my own bed, my body sore but in that pleasant way that means the night before was a lot of fun. I yawn and stretch a little, enjoying that feeling, when it hits my sleepy brain that I’m not in bed alone.

I’m sandwiched between two warm, firm bodies, and I sit up a little to see who it is. Knox and Ash are asleep on either side of me. They both look peaceful and almost… soft in the morning light from the window. Ash’s chocolate brown hair is a mess of bedhead, and Knox is curled around me like he wants to protect me even in his sleep. His lips are parted, and he snores softly, which is actually kind of cute, especially for someone so big and usually terrifying looking.

Since it’s just those two in my bed, I’m guessing Priest and Gage must have gotten up already. That tracks with what I know about them. Early risers, not ones to lie around sleeping in when there’s work to be done.

They’re probably already working on plans or whatever, dealing with this new curveball that got thrown our way last night. I feel like I should join them, but first I give in to the call of the pillows and the warm bodies next to me and lie back down for a bit.

It’s interesting to see any of the guys like this. We’re all such guarded people, always keeping things close to the chest so no one can find out more than we want them to. But it’s different now. So many of those walls came crashing down in the rain last night, and now I get little moments like this.

I never wanted them before. I never cared about shit like this. Soft mornings or watching someone sleep after we’d fucked each other’s brains out the night before. None of that was going to get me closer to my goals, so what was the point?

Now I have these men, and they care about my goals too. They care so much that they’re willing to do things I’d never ask them to. I’m not used to being able to have things I want, especially without sacrificing something else first. But maybe, for once, I’ve done enough sacrificing, and now I get to have something good that doesn’t come at a price.

Ash mumbles something in his sleep and scoots closer to me, like he’s seeking out my warmth. I reach out like I’m going to smooth his hair back, but then stop halfway through the motion, my hand just hanging in the air for a bit before I pull it back.

It’s a work in progress still, I guess. To be comfortable with these little gestures. I have no idea what I’m doing, really. Maybe one day, it’ll all be easier. Maybe Ash is right, and there will be time.

I think about last night. It started off so badly, with so many terrifying feelings, so much fear. All of it was a lot to handle. But then it turned into something amazing. I can feel how hard they fucked me, how many times they made me come. Until my body was worn out and nearly wrung dry for them.

And I’m… happy.

It’s weird.

I can’t really believe all of this is happening. From death threats and not trusting each other, and the pact Gage and I made that we were going to keep out of each other’s lives, to this—whatever this is.

Something warm and real. And unexpected. But I’m done trying to question it or second guess it. I stopped questioning and second-guessing all the bad shit in my life a long time ago, just accepting it for what it was. So now I’m going to do the same with this. Which is definitely weird, because I don’t think I’ve ever had anything really good to do that with.

First time for everything, I guess.

I leave Knox and Ash sleeping in my bed, wiggling my way out from between them so I can get dressed. I throw on shorts and a tank top and head downstairs, smothering a yawn with one hand.

I drag my fingers through my hair, and I can hear Gage and Priest talking in low, serious voices as soon as I get close to the kitchen.

We might have spent last night eating and joking and fucking, giving ourselves a little break from everything, but there’s still a lot going on. A lot we’ve got to deal with.

“We have to make sure,” Gage is saying. “There can’t be anything they can sniff out. I know how people like him think, and there’s no fucking way he’s going to be satisfied unless he feels like he knows the ins and outs of our business.”

Priest sighs. “So basically, we’re going to have to be on our toes almost constantly. Julian’s not an idiot. He’s been in business since his dad died. Probably even before that. He’s no low-rent thief.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Gage replies. “We don’t have a choice. And this is why we’ve been keeping things so tight anyway. We won’t be starting from scratch.”

“Morning,” I say as I come in, cutting into their conversation.

They both look up, and I can tell in this split second that things are different between all of us today. I guess I could have assumed that from waking up in bed with Knox and Ash, but the way Gage and Priest look at me really cements it.

Gage smiles, and Priest has warmth in his eyes as he looks me over. I can feel everywhere his gaze roams over me, taking in my bare arms and legs, and it makes goosebumps pop out on my skin.

“You slept well,” he says, and it’s not a question.

I snort and move to make coffee. “So would you if you came as many times as I did last night. I’m exhausted.”

“We had to carry you to bed,” Gage puts in. “You couldn’t even get up the stairs.”

There’s pride in his voice, like he’s happy they knocked me out for the count like that, and I laugh. It feels good.

---