Page 21 of The Gamble (The Players 3)

“This is true,” he admitted, “but before you, I never thought this was possible. You make me believe I can do anything. You make me want to takechances.”

“How about for your first chance, you go to the reception with me?” I squeezed his hand and waited for aresponse.

With a sigh, Drew nodded slightly. “I don’t want to disappoint my friends. Even though everything in me wants to curl up in our room with you, I’ll do this.Somehow.”

I bounced to my feet. “How about you do it with a littlesupport?”

“Well, I figured you’d be supporting me.” A smile played at the corners of hismouth.

I leaned in and whispered in his ear. “Jackie had the prescription filled and gave it to me. It’s upstairs in my other purse, but I stuck one pill in here just in case.” I stepped back and watched him for areaction.

His brows shot up, and then his shoulders heaved. Finally, Drew stood. “What are we waiting for? Let’s get the meds started so I can relax and enjoy thiswedding.”

“That’s the spirit.” I held out my arm. “Let’s go buy a card and you can slip into the bathroom to take the pill,okay?”

He hugged me close. “Thank you. I couldn’t survive today without you. I meanit.”

My heart raced. “I’m happy to be here for you. As you well know, this is saving metoo.”

* * *

Drew

Icouldn’t rememberthe last time I’d been this coherent, this aware. The experience was both exciting and frightening. Without Talia to anchor me, I don’t know how I would’ve managed even this much. As we walked through the main floor of the hotel on the way to the gift shop, I kept seeing people from my past. They seemed to be leering at me and I could feel the sweat breaking out on myforehead.

“Not so tight,” Talia whispered as she tugged on herhand.

Only when I looked down did I realize I’d been squeezing her so hard, I could’ve seriously injured her. “Dammit. I’msorry.”

She pulled me off to the side. “I know. Calm down. Ignorethem.”

I focused on inhaling deeply. “This anxiety thing,” I mumbled. “I think it’s why I liked alcohol and drugs so much. The fear was completely muted.” I leaned hard against the wall and wiped my brow with mycuff.

“Remind me to look for travel Kleenex in there,” Taliamurmured.

I glanced at her clutch. “Remind me to buy you a biggerpurse.”

“I have a bigger purse,” she repliedindignantly.

“Yes, but I want to buy you a new purse.” I smiled. The easy way we interacted soothedme.

“We’ll see.” She turned away. Then she paused when she realized I had more I wanted tosay.

“It’s about my past.” I inhaled deeply. “I want you to understand. I guess maybe I dotoo.”

“Okay, so tell me. You know I’ll listen, Drew.” Talia noddedreassuringly.

“I think I always had anxiety. I couldn’t talk to my family about it because no one would admit they had issues. Like my father wasn’t a sex addict. And my mother, she wasn’t depressed.” I rolled my eyes. “So, there was no way I could be all nervous and tense about being around people, or leaving my comfort zone. Hell, some days even my room.” I watched her for areaction.

“Go on,” Taliaurged.

“The first time I drank with the guys was the first time I finally felt relaxed; I finally knew what others must feel like all the time.” I rubbed my forehead. “Only, I couldn’t have just a little bit. I was always trying to keep the fear at bay, so I had to keep chasing it off with more liquor. Suddenly, I wasn’t just occasionally drunk. It had become a way of life. And somehow, this was more acceptable to my family than the idea I might needhelp.”

“This is why you were resistant to rehab, right?” She frowned. “Your parents wouldn’tunderstand.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I couldn’t even admit it to Jackie in all those weeks.” I pointed at her clutch. “Obviously, she was on to me, saw past my defenses, but without your understanding, I don’t think I could consider chasing the fear away with some anxiety medication. I’d already be diving into a bottle or calling my old drug dealer.” I groaned as I remembered. “I had him fly here just before I ended up in rehab. He showed up at Harry’s. God, I’m an ass. How can they forgive allthis?”

“Because they care for you,” Talia repliedsimply.

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