Page 33 of One Little Indiscretion

“I’m a thirty-year-old healthy female who hasn’t had sex in a while and you’re a good-looking guy. But the world is full of good-looking guys and I don’t jump them as a matter of habit so I think you’re safe, Mr. Murphy.” She emphasized the last two words and Ronan winced at her sarcasm.

“Look, I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, but I think it’s better to clear the air...”

“It didn’t need clearing,” Joa snapped. “You and Keely are driving me nuts! May I remind you that I don’t need a job, and that if I was considering helping you out, which I am not, I would be doing you a favor by looking after your boys until you find a decent nanny?”

The skepticism on his face pissed her off. Ronan was a little too entitled.

Joa slid off her stool and shook her head. “I’m not sure why I’m here and we’re going nowhere. I don’t want to be an au pair, you don’t really want to hire me. Maybe its best that you find someone else.”

“I would if I could.” Ronan cursed and rubbed his hand over his jaw. “Look, I didn’t mean to upset you...”

“I’m not upset, I’m annoyed,” Joa replied. “Don’t assume that I am one of those women who will use your kids to worm my way into your life. Yes, I’m attracted to you, but I’ve never thrown myself at a man in my life and you won’t be the first. I’m not that desperate or that insecure.”

She could, if she let herself, but she wouldn’t. She had more pride than that.

Ronan crossed his arms over his chest and the muscles in his biceps bunched. Damn, he really wasn’t helping.

“And if you don’t want to be ogled then put on a shirt!” Joa added.

Ronan released another curse and stepped out from behind the counter to walk in the direction of the laundry room and yep, she couldn’t miss it. His shorts were tented from a steel-hard erection. The bastard was lecturing her when he was equally affected.

“Seriously?” Joa nodded at his shorts. “That would suggest you are as attracted to me as I am to you.”

He braked and closed his eyes. “Morning wood.”

Joa wasn’t buying it. “Don’t BS me. You’re equally tempted.”

Why was she pushing this point when it would be smarter to ignore his reaction? What was wrong with her?

“You’re a sexy woman and yeah, I’m attracted.” He made it sound like he was admitting to a massive crime against humanity. “But it’s still not going to happen,” Ronan told her, his voice sharp.

“Damn straight it’s not. I prefer my lovers to be excited about taking me to bed, not angry and resentful.”

It was way past time to end the embarrassment and move on. “Let’s simply admit that there’s a mutual attraction that will never be acted on. Agreed?”

Ronan’s reply was a sharp nod.

Ronan looked thoughtful as he rubbed the back of his neck, showing the pale skin of his underarm and sexy tufts of underarm hair. Man, she was losing it. She needed sex; she really did.

But not, obviously, with him.

Joa glanced away, feeling a small hint of guilt. It wasn’t like her to refuse to help anyone—Isabel had taught her better—but Joa’s gut instinct was to put a considerable amount of distance between her and Ronan. But she understood that working for him, helping him with his kids, would be a mental step backwards. Blowing air over her bottom lip, she looked at the photograph of his wife attached to his fridge by a heart-shaped magnet. Ronan was also, and obviously, still in love with his wife.

Going to work for him would be like flying from the frying pan into the fire.

She’d placed herself in this position before, working for men to whom she was attracted and it was time to stop repeating past mistakes.

Her previous employees had been nice men, good men, but she hadn’t felt a fraction of the physical pull to them as she did to Ronan. Fighting that chemistry would be exhausting, but she was strong enough, had had enough practice at pushing down her emotions—the foster care system drummed that into you—that she could ignore this inconvenient attraction to Ronan Murphy with both her hands tied behind her back.

She would not put herself back into an uncomfortable, untenable, nobody-but-herself-to-blame situation. She had to look after herself first, just like she’d always been forced to do.

Joa stood up and reached for her bag, pulling it over her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, but no. I can’t. I hope you find someone soon.”

Ronan pushed his hands through his hair and looked horrified. Gobsmacked. Obviously, as a Murphy, he didn’t hear the word no very often.

“What?”

“Best of luck, Ronan,” Joa said, walking toward the back door. As she stepped into the sunroom, she turned and sent him a tight smile, drinking in that luscious body and doing her best to ignore his pissed-off expression.

“Oh, and if you don’t want your female employees to lust after you then I strongly suggest you put on some clothes when conducting job interviews, Murphy. Walking around half-naked isn’t conducive to keeping the arrangement businesslike and might give potential nannies the wrong impression.”

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