Page 25 of Scandalously Yours

Alessia

Ihad to admit to being scared for Kristopher’s daughter. While I had never met Kaylee, I had seen pictures of her, and I knew how much he doted on her. I didn’t really know what had happened to her, or if he even wanted me to know, but I assumed he might tell me because I was a doctor, and it was in my blood to want to help. I would respect his privacy and wishes, however hard as it might be. Due to my fear for his child, the sleep I had was fitful as best. I was too restless and wired up to rest, even though my body was exhausted. Kris had been rougher than usual with me, but I had asked him to be. My ass throbbed for various reasons, but by morning, it all seemed to be better.

I immediately packed up my things and had even called the airline to have my flight moved up. He would’ve long ago reached New York City so this wouldn’t look coincidental at all. Once I was on the flight, my thoughts turned to Kris and I kept looking down at my phone, hoping I would see a message from him. Even when I returned to LaGuardia, there was none to be found.

If he needs you, he’ll call you.That reminder echoed in my head as I went to retrieve my bags, then booked a Lyft ride home.

By the time I made it there, I still had no calls from him. I knew if something bad happened that there would be news about it because he was a Titan, and they couldn’t jaywalk without someone photographing it. Powering on my computer, my heart raced wildly in my chest as I searched for her name and his, and found nothing in the way of local news. There were pictures of the two together, including one of him at a father/daughter ball last fall. Anyone could see the love he had for Kaylee just by the way he looked down at her in any one of them.

My nerves were shot, and not hearing anything made me suspect that there was still something wrong. I decided to distract myself by unpacking my things, then I paced back and forth in front of my couch. I had also been chewing nervously on my lip as I debated calling him, anyway. Deciding to meet in the middle, I pulled up his latest message from me and sent a three worded one that no one would be able to misconstrue.

Is everything okay?

After I set my phone back down on the table, I took a seat on the couch. This uneasy feeling I was left with was one I hated, and I wished I would’ve just returned to the city when he did, despite his protests otherwise. There were so many things that could’ve happened, and I willed my brain not to even conjure up a single one of them. I was borrowing trouble as my grandfather used to tell me.

God, how I missed that man. He was still alive, but the grandfather I knew and loved was nowhere to be found inside that shell. My grandmother, parents, and other family members had all been able to come to terms with it, and seeing him everyday made the changes less noticeable. Before I came to New York City, he had been a bit forgetful at times, but otherwise he was a vibrant, attentive grandfather, and exactly the person I needed the most right now.

Or did I? If anyone in my family knew what I was doing, I would be disowned. Or at the very least, I would be sat down and given a stern lecture.

“You can’t expect a man to respect you if you don’t respect yourself, Ale. He’s still married, and you’re providing less incentive for him to change that,”my father would tell me. I could hear it now.

“You’ve been reading those dirty books of mine again,”my mother would chime in, and both parents would shake their head in disapproval. “You’re expecting a happily ever after that will likely never happen.”

But it would. The two of us loved each other, and where there was a will, there was a way. I just needed to find out what it was. Until I figured all that out, I would continue to support him. After all, that was what people in love did. They picked each other up, and stood by them through the good times and the bad. It was also what a married couple swore to do, so what if the situation between Kristopher and Hayley was just some of those bad times. Some had the potential to end things, but others could make them even stronger. If that happened, where would that leave me?

By your damn self, just like you were when Aiden left you too.

Standing back up, I started to pace again, certain I was going to wear a hole in the laminate soon if I didn’t stop. I needed a distraction. Deciding that cleaning the house would suffice, I went to the small coat closet where I stored all the cleaning supplies and pulled out everything I would need. Laundry also needed to be done, so I grabbed the liquid Tide and headed to the dirty clothes hamper in my bathroom. I lugged it across the bedroom to the hallway where the small stackable washer and dryer were stored.

Space was at a premium in this city, and the only time I had lived in any decent amount had been when I was a surrogate. Anton and Elsa had put me up in an apartment that had everything I could’ve needed at the time. I wished I could’ve stayed there longer. Once the baby was delivered, I essentially came back and instead of introducing an infant to its new home, I was instead left to pack up and head somewhere where the memories wouldn’t hurt me so badly.

That meant moving back to campus where I threw myself wholeheartedly into my studies. I had helped the Kingstons make their dream come true, so afterward, I needed to focus on my own. Being a doctor had been all I had ever wanted to be, and I worked hard to accomplish it. Up until a few months ago, I was thrilled with the direction of my life. Now, I knew what I had never realized was missing, and that was love. Success was an accomplishment to be celebrated, but it was a lonely life when you had no one to share it with. I thought I had truly found the one. He was a doctor too, so we had a common foundation to build upon. Kristopher was more than that, though. His intelligence went without question, but his charm, sense of humor, drop-dead gorgeous looks, and big heart had drawn me in. We were like those ships Henry Wadsworth Longfellow penned about all those years ago. It pained me to think that after crossing paths with one another, one day we would go our separate ways alone.

I frowned as the sentiment hit home, then let out the breath I’d been holding and threw my clothes into the washing machine. After putting the detergent inside and turning it on, I moved to the kitchen. There wasn’t much that needed to be done in there, but I still made sure to take the sponge and clean every surface I could before I returned to the laundry.

I put the damp clothes into the dryers, then got out the broom, dustpan, and mop. When I was younger, I hated to clean anything, but as I got older, I could now appreciate the therapeutic qualities of it. Once or twice, I would glance at my phone, only to find the same blank screen staring back up at me. Eventually, the clothes finished drying, and I lugged them into the bedroom where I put them away. Once I was done with that, I yawned. Cleaning was tiring. I needed a shower and then I would curl up with a book and try to go to sleep. After plugging up my e-reader, I grabbed my nightgown and panties, then headed into the bathroom.

For something that was supposed to be relaxing, it was proving to be anything but. I needed Kristopher and as I stood there under the scalding spray of water, I realized it was the first time I had ever admitted that to even myself. None of this was supposed to happen, but fate had thrown us together back in the Bahamas, and it was the same force that drew us to one another like a magnet.

I knew that Kris saw the same thing as me, but he wasn’t the only one. There were sometimes looks given to me by other medical staff at the hospital when they would see the two of us together. We never did anything out of the way, and he would even make a point of dragging others to get coffee. He was a phenomenal doctor, and an equally wonderful man. Rumors of his personality had turned out to be greatly exaggerated. I smiled as I remembered the night I had met him, and how I had told him that his staff considered him a dick. Never would I have imagined that he would take an interest in me. As he had even admitted himself, most men in his role were much older. It didn’t matter, though. He had empathy for all those around him.

My thoughts moved from him to his children. I’d only seen his son once, and it’d been when he was in the park, flying kites. His daughter was so beautiful, but both of her parents had stunning good looks. Although it was pointless to travel down that path, my mind began to wander, and I closed my eyes as I imagined a kid of ours and what he or she would look like. If the one I’d brought into the world for Anton and Elsa Kingston had been mine, he would be the perfect age to play with Kristopher’s son.

Stop dreaming!My eyes flew open as my own voice echoed in my head this time, the command coming from my own lips instead of someone such as my parents or grandparents. I scrubbed my hands, my face, then grabbed the body puff and soap. The water was growing cooler, but I stayed there and soon my tears mingled with those droplets as the impossibility of this relationship hit home once more.

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