Page 12 of Tainted Kitten

Before I get a chance to tell him to stop apologising, that last night wasn’t his fault, he bolts out of the room like someone has lit a fire under his arse. I listen to his footsteps retreat, and then I hear his deep voice as he talks quietly with Agatha before leaving.

My heart feels emptier without Tyler here. Loneliness seeping in, even though Shaun is still here next to me. I snuggle in closer to him, inhaling his scent and listening to his slow breathing as he sleeps. I do this until my heart can’t take it anymore and then spend the next hour crying silently, my tears soaking the pillow under me.

At 7am, Agatha comes in to get us up, and thirty minutes later, she drops us at the end of Shaun’s long sandy driveway. The sun is already warming the air as it rises higher in the sky, and for the first time, I soak in the natural beauty of Shaun’s family’s property.

Grapevines line both sides of the driveway. The right side filled with larger plants than the left side, so I guess they were planted earlier. I don’t really know. I know nothing about a vineyard, but one thing is for certain. It’s beautiful.

“What are you thinking about?” Shaun’s voice gains my attention as we walk up his drive, and I drag my gaze from the landscape to my Spanish Casanova.

“Just how beautiful it is here. I’ve never really looked at plants and nature and been so drawn to it like I am with this.” I gesture to the grapevines. “Your family has a beautiful property.”

“Really?” Shaun frowns, looking around at our surroundings. “I’ve never really thought of it as beautiful. It’s just hard work to me.”

“That’s really sad.” I glance back at the rows of vines and let the peace soak in. “I’m going to come here to die. I want my last moments to be here, amongst these vines when it's my time.” I spin with my arms open wide, gesturing to our surroundings. I try to ignore the biting pain between my legs and the way my whole body aches. “I want to lie down in the middle of them and look up at the sky, surrounded by this beauty.”

Shaun chuckles, “I’ll be sure to install a track accessible to a wheelchair or walking frame for when you are old and grey, then.”

I turn back to Shaun, grinning. “You are so thoughtful.”

“I know, right?” Shaun grins like the most adorably sexy dork ever. I don’t know how it’s possible, but he pulls it off.

When I glance up as we reach the top of the small incline, my eyes land on the roofline of Vixen’s Lodge in the distance. Like a bolt of lightning, memories swarm me as the reality of what happened last night sinks in.

Last night, my right to choose was taken away from me.

Last night, I was forced into a situation I didn’t want.

I was restrained, so I couldn’t fight.

I was gagged to keep me silent.

Last night, I was tortured and humiliated by using the one thing I love against me.

Sex.

“Hey, Rhys?” Shaun steps in front of me, his warm hands gripping my shoulders, as his eyes dart frantically over my expression. “What just happened? What’s wrong?”

I can’t speak. Tremors work their way up my body as my vision blurs, so I slowly point at the colonial-style building that houses two of the vilest people I’ve ever come across. Fuck, they are just as bad as Brian and Julie. I bet if they ever crossed paths, they’d be the best of friends.

Shaun glances over his shoulder to see where I’m pointing and then he curses quietly before pulling me to his chest.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Kitten.” He stiffens, “Shit, sorry. I probably shouldn’t call you that.”

“No, don’t stop calling me that.” I mutter into the crook of his neck, “I like it when you and Ty call me Kitten.”

“Ok. If you’re sure?” The poor guy sounds so uncertain, so I nod into his neck, wrapping my arms tighter around him, seeking more of his comfort.

We stand wrapped together on his sandy driveway for a few minutes until I loosen my grip on him, letting him know I’ve pulled my shit together. Then, in silence, Shaun links our hands and walks me to his picturesque farmhouse.

His mum and dad are nowhere in sight, and it’s only after we stumble out of the bathroom together, steam flowing out with us from our shower, that we run into his brother Derek. He doesn’t bat an eyelid at my presence, just gives me a warm smile and ahibefore telling us both to be ready to leave in thirty minutes. Then, Shaun and I go up to his loft to get ready for school.

There’s a big part of me that can’t fathom going to school and putting up with teachers and bitchy girls and grabby guys, but it’s the thought of the still loneliness of being home by myself that urges me on to go to school. Unfortunately, by the time we arrive, my mood has flattened tenfold, and I struggle to even put on a fake smile.

Big bad moody Garrett spends way too long studying my face when he sees me walk into school, making me feel all sorts of self-conscious. Simon throws an accusing glare Shaun’s way for my clearly visible mood, and Lexi asks me what’s wrong each time we cross paths, but I just tell her I’m not feeling well today. Even Bell, who’s been annoyed at me for spending so much time with my new friends, looks concerned when she sees me.

My first class is Food Tech, and Simon works in overdrive, trying to tease me with the food we are cooking. I love this part about him. His playfulness. His love for food play. They are things I love too… well; Ididlove them, but now, suddenly, his sexual innuendo’s make me uncomfortable. They make me feel dirty, which is crazy, right? I already know I’m the dirtiest bitch around Fox Pines Catholic. So why does it make my skin crawl?

My second class is Viscom with Simon again, and this time, he tries to coax me out of class to see if the photo lab is free. That room is my domain. My lair. So why does the thought of walking into that room and locking the door make my heart race for the wrong reason? What the fuck is wrong with me? I should be on my knees blowing Simon, yet the only blowing I’m doing is blowing off his advances and pretending like I actually want to revise for my exam.