Page 28 of Contract Of Shame

“I don’t think of you like that,” he said. A lump formed in his throat, and he hated how bitter his world tasted. He’d done that. He had caused Scarlet to think of herself as a whore.

“What then? What more could you possibly want from me?” She collapsed in a heap on the floor. “I want it all to stop,” she sobbed.

The dam had finally burst.

Richard picked her up in his arms and carried her into the bathroom. She fought him a little when he began removing her clothing. He soothed and made sure she knew he was only there to offer comfort.

He ran the bath and put plenty of lavender bubble bath in. Her sobs continued from the corner, and he hated the sound. She sounded so lost and afraid.

Once he seated her in the warm water he didn’t like how distant and vacant she became, and he divested himself of his clothes to sit behind her.

He pulled her back and rested her body against him. Not saying a word they lay in the bath until her tears subsided. Richard was falling in love with this woman. He stared down at her head, and knew in his heart how much she’d come to mean to him. The contract had been a fuck-up on his part. He didn’t like waiting. The act had been nothing more than a child throwing its dummy out of a pushchair because mummy had said no to sweeties.

“That man downstairs is Harry’s father,” she whispered.

A pause and her hands rested on her stomach. He waited for her.

“In high school I was a mess. I looked a little like Opal. Over developed for my age, and the only attention boys gave me was to tease me about my size. Then one day a handsome young teacher came to the school, and he showed me so much respect. I thought I’d fallen in love with him. No other girl held his interest but me.”

Richard’s heart twisted in his chest. Already, from her reaction he knew he wasn’t going to like the ending to this story.

“By the end of term we were sort of dating. We’d hang out, and one day we kissed. So magical, at least I thought at the time. Nothing happened, just a kiss, and I was on cloud nine. Then about six months later his wife came back to town. She’d been away on some training or something. I didn’t know he was married.” Scarlet took a deep breath.

“I ended it. I hadn’t known he was married, and I refused to help a man destroy his marriage vows. That same night when my parents were out I let him in, so we could talk. How fucking stupid was I? We argued; and then I said something, and before I knew what was happening he’d fought me to the floor.” Her tears returned in full. Richard held her, and his heart bled for the young woman she’d been. Nothing more than a child.

“He was your first, and he didn’t take you willingly.” He knew she couldn’t finish the story.

“Nine months later Harry came.”

Richard fisted his hands. The bastard who’d been touching her downstairs had raped his woman. He wanted to find the bastard, cut his balls off and feed them to him, personally. Wait until he found the disgusting piece of shit.

“Don’t think about it,” she whispered.

“What?”

“It won’t do any good. Like he said back then, who’d believe me over a professional teacher? Even now I’d be scorned and called a slut. I’d rather just leave him to his wife and give Harry all of my love.”

Richard held her in his arms and tried with all of his might to tell her how he felt. He was in love with Scarlet Hughes. For the rest of his life he wanted to love and protect and never leave her alone.

“Does that mean when you and I had—”

“Sex?”

“Yes. Does that mean it was your first time?” She nodded. His head was running rampant with so many thoughts. The comment she’d made about no one believing her over a teacher struck a chord with him. In the office before she’d signed the contract hadn’t he said the exact same thing? Richard cursed.

“I’m a fucking bastard.”

“Why are you?” her sweet voice asked.

“Because before I got you to sign that damn paper I said the same thing, or as near as, damn it.”

Scarlet didn’t dispute it, and he knew in his heart he’d hurt her more with that comment. In fact, he had probably hurt her as much with the comment on the same level as the contract.

“How did you cope? I’ve heard of women having breakdowns and everything going wrong for them?”

“When it happened I think I just functioned. I didn’t try to think but keep busy. I saw him every day, but made sure I was never alone with him. Did homework, studied, worked my ass off, and I started to feel normal. Like I could forget about it as a bad dream. When I found out I was pregnant with Harry, I couldn’t believe it. I got sucked under by the responsibility, and everything sort of happened at once. I graduated and had Harry at eighteen. I gave birth after I graduated from high school.” She stopped and ran a wet hand over her face. “I don’t know how I did it. Being pregnant and feeling him for the first time and then seeing Harry on the ultrasound was the most amazing thing in the world. I didn’t see him as a result of a horrible act but as my salvation. Every day I look at him I know in my heart, I survived.”

“You really are an amazing woman,” he whispered and kissed her temple.

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