Page 82 of Entangled

“Jace…” I try to interrupt, but he holds up a hand to me.

“You’re not just some summer fling to me or a way to pass the time. I like you, Blondie. A lot.”

I stare into his open eyes, feelings right up front and center for me to see, and know it’s truth time. Time for me to open up some scars and give him a bit of my terrible tale. I hate it, but whatever this is with him can’t go any further until he understands some things. Some of the reasons behind the fear and brokenness he’s slowly worked his way through.

Be smart, El. Don’t let him think you have something to give when you already gave it away.

I take a sip of champagne, trying to fortify myself about what’s about to come. “You need to understand, Jace, if you want things between us to go any further…” I dart my eyes away at my spectacular failure to make the right words come out and sigh before bringing my eyes back to his curious gaze. “There are parts of me. Some things that I will never be able to give you. That, for better or worse, I already gave away.”

He stares at me for a minute and I can see the wheels turning before he asks softly. “What happened?”

“As I’m sure you can imagine… I was already a little bit damaged by what happened with my parents. And that was before.” I give him a humorless smile. “I didn’t really believe in relationships. Ran scared at the mere thought of them actually. But last summer… I finally fell for someone, and I fell hard. It was, god.” I shake my head, remembering all those little moments with Coop. “It was an all-consuming kind of love. The kind that makes you overlook everything besides a need for more of that one person. He broke down my walls and what we had… it was epic. I thought it would last forever. That he was my forever. And not in the stupid, silly way a lot of girls do. But in the way that—it’s just—I suck at this.” I suck in a breath. “It’s just, for better or worse. He will always have a part of me that I’ll never get back, that I lost.” I finish softly and give him an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I’m not trying to like, reminisce with you about it… I just, you have to understand—”

“No, no. I get it,” he cuts me off, shaking his head. “But what… what happened, between y’all, why did it end?”

I take a sip of champagne to fight the tightness clawing its way up my throat. “The truth is… I don’t know, I guess. It just did.” I give him a sad smile and shrug. “But the point is, you have to understand. I can’t be broken like that again, Jace. I’m not sure I’d survive it.”

He stares at me for a long time, brows drawn down in thought before speaking. “You would, Blondie.” He clears his throat. “Survive it. Just so you know.”

I shake my head. “I don’t know.”

“You would. You’re a survivor.” A grin pulls at his lips as he relaxes back into his chair. “You may bitch and groan about it a little along the way, but you are. So don’t let the fear of what happened with him keep you from embracing that moment in the sun with me.”

I cock a brow at him. “And what if this all goes to shit too?”

He shrugs, seemingly unconcerned. “That’s just a part of being alive. Pain is going to find you in life whether you seek it or not. Better to experience the high and be a little bit broken from the story than spend your whole life fucking starving.”

I open my mouth to respond but stop, simply staring into his firework eyes. Realizing that Coop doesn’t even come to mind anymore when I look at them.

All I see is Jace.

It was strange, this feeling of letting go, of being put back together.

Equal parts guilt and elation as I began to really fall again. Fall hard for him.

His eyes turn soft. “But I am sorry that happened to you, and I can promise I have no intention of hurting you, El.”

“Yeah.” I sigh wearily at the familiarity of his words. “The thing is, I’m not sure he did either.”

“Yeah.” He flashes me those dimples, grinning wickedly. “But he’s not here, is he? So obviously, as I’ve said before, he’s an idiot… but all the better for me.”

My lips twitch up despite the heavy topic and I shake my head. “Fucking trouble, Dawson. Knew it from the minute I met you.”

He shoots me a wink and takes a sip of champagne. “Right back at you, Delacroix.”

Chapter 22

Present Day

Jace made good on his promise to let me sleep when we were done with breakfast, sending me down to the bedroom as he took us home. I had felt guilty leaving him but it wasn’t like I could do it either. So I had told him to come join me as soon as we were back, stripped off my dress and got into bed. When I felt him come join me later, I had wrapped myself around him until we were well and truly tangled up. His warmth an intoxicating cocoon as he pulled the blankets over us and nuzzled my neck, kissing me softly as we both drifted back off to sleep the day away.

It was different now, between us, after everything I had told him this morning.

I knew that. Even in my sleep.

The sound of my phone ringing wakes me up some hours later and I reach under the pillow, intending to ignore the call but pause when I see it’s Yvie. I already hadn’t returned her last call because of everything going on and I hate to make her worry. Sliding out from Jace’s arms, I grab one of his T-shirts off the floor and throw it on before slipping quietly from the room.

Pressing the button to answer the phone, I bring it to my ear and make my way out of the cabin. “Hello, dearest aunt.”

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