Page 110 of Entangled

“I mean…” I sigh, floundering as I try to figure out the right words to use. “I mean, what do you want for your life? Where, where do you see it going?”

Could you sound any more like a girl interviewing someone on a date, El?

Damn, but I really do suck at these conversations.

“Is this…” I wave my hand out to the space surrounding us. “Landing Point, the bar, what you want?”

He takes a sip of his wine and looks down, swirling it around in the glass for a minute before answering. “I’ve actually been thinking about that lately… I think—” He blows out a breath. “I think I want to go back to school. Become a doctor maybe, probably for people with cancer like my mom. I want to help them beat what she couldn’t. I actually did pretty well in school despite my delinquent tendencies.” He shrugs, bringing his eyes back to mine. “Figured I’d apply to some schools in LA.”

I stare into his eyes, hardly daring to believe before asking softly. “LA?”

He nods. “I want a life with you in it. That much I know.” His lips pull up into a grin. “Plus, I’m going to need to make more than a bartender’s salary to maintain that fancy-ass car of yours.”

A wide smile breaks free on my lips as I dip them to his, raising a hand to the back of his head and kissing him deeply for a moment. Heart so full of happiness it feels as if all the blood in my body is rushing to it at once. Pulling back and breaking the kiss, I bring my hand around to run a thumb over one of those dimples. “I can maintain my own car, Dawson,” I tease. “But I do appreciate the thought and I might even know of a new club you could work at if you want.”

“That’d be great, Delacroix.” He scoffs a laugh. “Because med school is expensive as shit.”

I laugh and take a sip of my wine as he reaches up to tug at my hair playfully. “Listen though, this town, these people… they’ll always be home to me. So maybe, I don’t know, we find a way to split time or something when I’m not in school?”

I give him a soft smile and drop my lips to his again. “Absolutely.”

It dawns on me then, as I stare into his contented firework eyes reflecting my own happiness back at me. That I need to tell him the truth about Coop. The whole horrible truth about the one thing I might never be able to give him. I had been content to let Coop be one of the ghosts haunting me before. But now, with Jace… if we were going to have any kind of future, I’d have to be honest with him. And I might even have to find Coop. You couldn’t exactly divorce a ghost.

But… fuck. I can’t, I don’t know… how I’d even be able to face him without shattering all over again.

The ideas of divorce and trying to find him twist my stomach up into a painful knot that’s only made unbearable when followed by the thought of not being able to find him because he’s not even here anymore. Not alive to find.

So instead, I lean back on the steps and take a large sip of my wine, pushing the thoughts aside and avoiding it all like I do best. Basking in the last sun of the day and leaving the shadows for the night.

Dipping my head to the side, I cock a brow and smirk playfully. “Hey, Jace. Do you think you could play me some Taylor Swift?”

Chapter 30

Present Day

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come over?” Jace’s voice sounds through the phone pressed to my ear as I nudge the door to Gram’s house open with my hip. The heavy weight of my parents’ police file held against my chest.

“I’m sure.” I walk into the living room and set the file down on the couch before turning to look out the front window, seeing brilliant red streaks of evening coloring the sky. “I need to climb this mountain alone, Jace,” I tell him softly.

Plus… if I freak the fuck out, which is probably going to happen at some point, I want to have at least a minute to pull myself back together before he sees me.

A heavy silence comes through the phone and I know what I’m asking goes against the grain for him. “Enjoy your boys’ night with Zane.” I laugh softly. “God knows he would throw a fit if I changed my mind at this point.”

“He would understand.”

“Still.” I take a breath, nerves filling my stomach at the task that awaits me. “Just no tattoos, okay? Not without running them by me first.”

That melodic laugh comes through the phone. “Promise.”

“Good.”

“Promise to call if you need me?”

“Promise,” I answer truthfully.

“And we always keep our promises, right?” he teases.

“Always.” My lips twitch up into a small smile. “Go have fun.”

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