My thoughts were scattered, all over the place as I tried pushing Zach out of my head. Maybe I should have joined the girls for a drink and tried to socialize but not hearing from Zach, threw me off.
I had asked my mom and Jay if I could work as much as possible at the tattoo shop and I also spent a lot of time at the center. Between both places, I was able to distract myself from thoughts of him. But now that I was home and curled up in bed, my thoughts traveled back to him. His touch. His kisses. His sweet and sometimes dirty words. The way he looked at me like I was the most beautiful woman in the world. Like I was all that mattered. Like I washis.
So many times, during the past few days, I had picked up the phone to call him or even send him a text, but I couldn’t.
Meadow told me to wait for him to come to me.
Gigi said she had crappy experience with guys, so her advice wouldn’t help.
Piper had fallen into herself and we didn’t know why.
No one said whether they heard from Zach or not. If they did, they never told me. The only time I heard anything was when Ashton told me they had talked, and Zach had apologized for hitting him.
My heart felt lighter then, but it still didn’t help the fact that I never saw him or talked to him myself.
A commotion sounded outside my door, but I couldn’t be bothered to go see what was going on. I just didn’t care anymore.
Opening my eyes, I glanced at the clock and saw that it was only midnight. The party was in full swing outside. Muffled voices could be heard while the low beat of the music thrummed in the background.
I could usually ignore the parties and sleep through them but tonight was not one of those times. Rolling over onto my back, I caught a shadow move out of the corner of my eye. I jumped, shooting up in bed.
The shadow came closer, revealing…
“Zach?” I placed my hand on my chest, easing my racing heart. “You scared the shit out of me.”
“Sorry.” He gave me a small smile.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, my body coming alive at the mere intensity rolling off of him.
“I…” He started pacing. “I know I shouldn’t be here. But I can’t wait anymore. I’m sorry for everything. I can’t work. I can’t sleep. I can’t even fucking think straight.” He stopped and turned toward me. “I need you.”
“You hurt me, Zach. You broke my heart.”
He looked away. “I know. I’ll never forgive myself for what I put you through.”
I moved to the edge of the bed, swinging my legs over the side. “Come here,” I said, holding my arms out.
He rushed toward me but much to my surprise, he dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around my waist.
My chest tightened.
Zach placed his head on my lap, squeezing me with everything in him. Everything that made up us. “I’m so sorry. I tried staying away. I know you need space, but I can’t do it anymore. I can’t go on and not have you by my side. And I’m sorry for pushing you away. I know you won’t hurt me. I know that but I’m scared, Luna.”
“You thought I needed space?” I asked, running my fingers over the back of his head.
He looked up at me. “I was giving you time. So I threw myself into my work and the gym. The next thing I knew, three weeks had come and gone.”
“Oh, Zach, I actually thought…I just…” I shook my head. “I don’t know what I thought. But I’ve tried calling you and stopped myself. Because I was giving you time too. I thought it was over for good. And you have nothing to be scared of. I won’t hurt you. Ever.”
“I know that now, but I hurt you instead.” Zach grabbed my hands and pulled me off the bed and onto his lap. “I’m sorry. I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but I am truly sorry. I’ll spend the rest of my life making up for it. For what I did. For pushing you away and running to Clara. I shouldn’t have done that. I’m…”
I cupped his nape, pulling him against me. “I know nothing happened and I’m sorry you felt the need to push me away.”
“Don’t.” He leaned his forehead against mine. “Don’t ever apologize to me. You did nothing wrong. At all. It’s all me.
“I was giving you time,” I whispered, reveling in the fact that he was finally back in my arms.
“I never need time when it comes to you, Luna.” He inhaled a shaky breath. “I wanted to come by sooner but in all honesty, I was scared. I pushed you away and I thought you would do the same to me. I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it if that happened. So that’s why I stayed away.”