Me:Fucking hell,you’re such an arsehole
Me:And don’t try to pretend you didn’t admit to fantasising about me too
Wes Holt:I would never??
Wes Holt:And now I have a ton off real-life footage for the wank bank
Me:I don’t want to sound like a prat but should I be concerned about the lack of condom usage last night?
Wes Holt:When have you ever worried about sounding like a prat before?
Wes Holt:But no, no need for concern. I’m completely healthy. On PrEP and get tested monthly like clockwork
Me:Monthly?? That seems like a lot
Wes Holt:??????Why is it a lot? I have regular casual sex where I rarely use condoms a) because it’s a hassle with the piercing and b) because why would I when I don’t need them for birth control? and also c) because bare feels sooooo much better. And also even though we take every safety precaution, wear gloves, never reuse needles etc you can still never be too careful in my line of work
Me:Fair points
Wes Holt:I’m working under the assumption Mr Pillar of Responsibility is up to date on all his checks…have I made an incorrect assumption?
I roll my eyes at the screen. Seriously, does he have any other setting than ‘arsehole’?
Me:??No
Me:Fucking prick
Wes Holt:Ouch. You cut me real deep with that one
Me:I genuinely hate you
Wes Holt:But you love my cock??
Me:It’s okay…
Wes Holt:Devon, lies do not become us
Me:Are you quoting The Princess Bride right now?
Wes Holt:I’m actually impressed you recognised it
Me:It’s your sister’s favourite movie
Wes Holt:And there’s the bucket of ice water the conversation needed
I cringe. I know I should probably feel a hell of a lot more guilty about the fact that Wes is my ex-fiancée’s brother, but weirdly that’s not what’s bothering me about this situation. At least it’s not bothering enough to be a real factor.
Me:So what now?
Wes Holt:Well I guess that depends
Me:On what?
Wes Holt:On how guilty you feel right now
Jesus, was the bastard reading my mind?
Me:Would it be horrible to say not at all?