Page 59 of Devil's Bargain

He searches my face before his eyes flick down to my neck again. “I can help you.”

My smile is weak. “No, Rick. You can’t.”

He draws his feet up and rests his forearms on his knees. He stares straight ahead. “Was it consensual?”

Define consensual.

“I don’t know,” I whisper.

His head snaps to me. “What do you mean you don’t know?”

I cringe. “Can we please not talk about this.”

“Answer the question, April!”

I drop my head back and look at the sky overhead. The wind is picking up. When I focus back on Rick, his eyes are blazing. “I don’t have a choice.”

He curses.

“I don’t want it, but when…” I trail off, looking out over the lake. “I enjoy it.”

His eyes burn a hole into the bruise on my cheek. “He hits you?”

“Yes,” I whisper, “but I want him to.”

I don’t look at him. I can’t handle the expression on his face right now. I’m already ashamed of myself enough as it is.

“You want him to hit you?”

I press my lips together. “Yes.” I chance a look at him, smiling ruefully. “I’m fucked up, Rick.”

He’s staring at me, his eyes bouncing between mine.

“I did warn you!”

He picks up a stone and stands up. Then skims it over the lake.

“Say something,” I whisper.

He looks down at me as the first raindrop falls. “I don’t know what to say.”

I prop my chin atop my knees. The rain is coming down harder now, soaking through my clothes and making patterns on the lake.

He sinks down in the sand next to me. Water drips off his nose. “Is that what you’re into?”

I don’t look at him as I nod. “Yeah.”

“Fuck!” he whispers, elbows on knees.

“I know.”

“I don’t think I could do it.”

I rest my cheek on my knees and watch him. “Do what?”

He’s not looking at me. Sand sticks to his wet jeans. He tries to brush it off. “Hit someone during sex.”

My eyes fall closed. I take a moment to feel the warm summer rain on my skin. “You should go home.” When I blink my eyes open, he’s watching me.

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