Page 67 of Perfect Catch (Boys of Summer 2)

“Keep it up and I’ll ask if you’re ready for a meeting with the human resources lawyers.” Tannis rolled her eyes.

Ramon was harmless, but he tended to come on too strong. Alex worried if he didn’t tone down his conquistador routine with Tannis, the girl would actually take him to HR.

Emmy came through the door next, patting Tannis’s back. “Don’t worry about Ramon, T, I’ll take care of him. I think Chet could use someone to check the quad tightness he’s been feeling, okay?”

Tannis wrinkled her nose, pulling her shoulder free of Emmy’s hand. Alex glanced at Jasper who looked annoyed, then back to Emmy who was tying her long, dark blonde hair up into a ponytail. If she was frustrated by Tannis, she wasn’t letting it show.

“How are you feeling?” she asked Alex, watching as Jasper dug in.

“I think your sidekick is trying to pry me apart like a chicken wing.”

“I take offense to being considered her sidekick,” Jasper said.

“You are my assistant.” Emmy crooked her fingers at Ramon and tapped the padded table beside her, silently commanding him to come.

“Assistant has an air of propriety. Sidekick sounds like I’m the Robin to your Batman. And everyone knows sidekicks get the worst outfits.”

Emmy indicated her bright orange Felons polo shirt then pointed to his identical one.

“Oh, please.” Jasper dropped his hands from Alex’s back and grinned at Emmy. “We both know I look better in this than you do.”

Jasper was a fit dude, and his arms rivaled any of the guys on the team, so it was tough to say which of them filled out the shirt better. Alex wanted to vote for Emmy because boobs, but since her boobs belonged to his best friend, he decided to stay silent on the whole thing.

Taking the safe road he said, “I don’t care which of you is the hero, frankly, as long as Jasper gets his thumb out of my bones.”

Jasper kneaded him harder. “The pain is how you know it’s working.”

“It’s working.” Alex tried to smack the assistant A.T. away, but Jasper had situated himself in such a way that it was impossible to reach him. Maybe it was a technique they learned at those fancy med schools, how to brutalize their charges while avoiding retaliation.

Ramon was sitting with Emmy now. It didn’t look like she was doing anything to hurt him, so maybe Jasper was just a sadist. A mean, pointy-fingered sadist.

“Stop it,” Alex grumbled.

“Stop being so goddamn tense, then.”

“He is a big baby, this one. Such sad faces, yet he can’t take his therapy like a man.” Ramon chuckled.

“What does that phrase even mean?” Emmy asked, prodding Ramon in the ribs. “Take it like a man?”

“It means, you know… It means…” He shrugged helplessly, as if to say, Don’t blame me, my English isn’t as good as yours. He had a habit of using the second language thing as a foil when his real problem was sticking his foot in his mouth.

“No, I don’t know what it means.” Her tone was firm, but she laughed lightly. The guys in the clubhouse were used to Emmy by now, so used to her in fact they sometimes forgot she was a woman. She didn’t tend to remind them, but occasionally she’d say something or do something and they’d be forced to remember she wasn’t just a friendly sister figure or sexless entity who tended to their wounds.

“I didn’t mean anything. It is only a saying, you know?”

“It’s a silly saying,” Emmy countered. “And if you don’t know what it means, you shouldn’t say it.”

“He doesn’t know what most things he says mean,” Alex offered. “It hasn’t stopped him yet.”

“I know exactly what I mean when I say your face looks like a donkey anus.”

“Which implies you know what a donkey anus looks like.”

“I do. I do know. It looks like your face.”

“Wow,” Emmy said, shoving Ramon down on the table. “I’m never sure if I’m an athletic trainer or a babysitter.”

“Both,” Alex answered.

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