Page 38 of Chasin' Cole

He pulls himself out a little and thrusts back in slowly. We moan in unison as he fills me up again. Out, back in. Over and over, a steady rhythm of his body pleasurin’ mine. I know it's supposed to hurt, but I can't feel any pain lookin' in Cole's eyes. I only feel him. His goodness and his love.

As the minutes pass by, he moves a little faster, pullin' out further each time until he's all the way out and pumpin' back inside with long strokes. My fingers dig into the muscles on his back, and I moan and gasp and cry out from every sensation, every inch of him pleasurin' the depths of me. It's soul-bindin' this makin' love stuff.

I want to do it with him. Only him.Forever.

The word cause tears to fill my eyes. They spill from my lashes and slide down my temples, landing' on Cole's flannel pillowcase.

"I—"

But he doesn't finish the sentence because he shudderin' and gruntin' and buryin' his face in my neck, his movements sloppy and jerky.

"I'm sorry," he apologizes as he lays on top of me, his body moldin' to mine.

"For what?" I whisper as I run a hand through his damp locks, over his neck and down his back. Every inch of him is soaked with sweat.

"It hit me all at once," he laughs. "I couldn't hold it in."

I can't keep the sob from escapin' my chest as he kisses my shoulder. Tears flood my face and vision as I cry harder, holdin' on to him. He's leavin'. He's goin' to take my heart and soul with him. And I don't think I'm going to survive it.

“What’s wrong, Rose” He asks. “Did I hurt you?”

Not yet, Cole. But when you pack up your life again and leave me, it’s goin’ to hurt so much worse than I thought.

“I’m just…”

“What?” he coos in my ear as his fingers dig into my hip. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re leavin’,” I cry. “You’re leavin’ and I don’t know how to hold in all the grief anymore.”

He slips off me and lays on his back. I rest my head on his chest as his arms envelope me in his warm embrace.

“When Kenzie and Rowdy did what they did,” Cole exhales, “I lost my best friend. I lost a lot of people in this town. So, I left. I keep leaving because I’m not sure this is home for me. But you, Rose, you make it home. You make leaving hard. You make wanting to come back so much easier. I don’t how I’m going to leave. I don’t know how I’m going pack my bags and spend 12 months in a remote location dreaming of you. Of only you.”

I cover my mouth with my hand as I cry harder, tears splashing on Cole’s skin.

“I didn’t know you were going to be at the creek that day,” he continues. “I thought I could jump in and cool off without anyone around. I thought I could spend an hour alone. I thought…I didn’t know you’d be there. I didn’t know I’d feel differently about you that day. I didn’t know you were so brave and bold. Now, I have to leave it all and I don’t want to.”

“I’m s-sorry,” I choke out.

“No,” Cole shakes his head before he kisses the top off my head. “I’m glad I have a reason to come back now. I’m glad I know someone in this place loves me. I’m glad you’re mine. Even if it’s just for a little while.”

“I don’t want it to be a little while,” I argue. “I want it to be forever.”

“I can’t promise you that, Rose.” His tone is full of regret. “I wish I could. I want to. I want to promise you forever. But I don’t want to hold you back.”

“I’ve spent my whole life waitin’ for someone to love me, too,” I remind him. “For someone to be just mine. No sharin’, no drama, no wonderin’ if the rug’s gonna be ripped out beneath my feet.”

“I will give you that one day,” he promises, “I just can’t give it to you right now.”

“I don’t mind waitin’, Cole. I don’t think I could ever be happy with anyone else.”

“I don’t think I could either.”

Chapter 13– Call Me Crazy

Cole hands me a T-shirt and a pair of his boxers. I bring them up to my face and shamelessly inhale.

"What are you doing?" Cole chuckles.

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