Page 6 of Amor Prohibido

“Jason,” she started as soon as we were through the exit and walking across the garden bar.

It was deserted apart from a lone smoker braving the winter chill for a quick nicotine fix.

“It’s Jace, Jax. You’ve always called me Jace, and you better not stop, because we’re friends. Goddammit, we’re family!” I exclaimed, unable to keep the desperate strain from my voice.

“Okay, fine,Jace,” she snarled through her teeth. “What do you want?”

The bite of winter had her shivering and wrapping her arms around her slender waist. I unzipped my jacket without hesitation and offered to her. She shook her head and held up a hand to stop me, but I refused to let her turn it down. She was spirited like that; she didn’t like accepting help or appearing weak, and that was a credit to Maria’s guiding influence. She not only taught Jax how to be strong and how to stand up for herself, but also showed her what it meant to be Latina physically and spiritually. Because of that, Jax knew who she was and where she came from and used both to draw courage when needed. Like now. While she stood glaring with lips pouted and eyebrows arched high.

“C’mon, J, you know how much I hate being cold. Put on the damn jacket before I change my mind and use it to re-warm my balls.”

Albeit fleeting, humour tugged at the corner of her mouth. After another pause and a mini stare-down, Jax reneged and stepped forward. She slipped her arms into the sleeves, pulled it close around herself, and sighed deeply.

“Jace…”

“Please, J. Let me say what I need to first.”

Surprisingly, she backed down, though eyed me in the most unsettling manner, making me sweat despite the cold night air.

I picked up her wine and took a quick swig before handing it to her, then reached for my beer. I sucked in a huge breath, gathered my thoughts, and swallowed down all the parts of us I’d broken.

“I want to talk about what I said to you and how much I regret every word. I would give anything to undo the hurt I’ve caused you. I miss having you in my life and there’s a massive void without you in it. Like,irreparable!”I emphasised by throwing my arms wide and ignoring the beer sloshing onto my hand. “Tell me, Jax, what can I do to make it up to you? Anything. Anything at all.”

“There’s nothing you can do.”

I gulped. “There has to besomething.I know how much I broke you that night and I am so,sofucking sorry. It’s been killing me ever since.” My chest heaved and burned with regret. There was so much more I wanted to say, but I couldn’t find a way to put it into words.

Jax hadn’t moved. Hell, she’d hardly blinked during my entire outpouring. When she finally spoke, her voice came shaky, and she slowly punctuated each word, taking her time. Prolonging my discomfort for as long as possible.

“You hurt me deep, Jason. I was in the wrong too, I admit it. I set out to be a bitch, and it backfired in a way I hadn’t imagined. But you… How could you say such a thing?Youof all people.” She trailed off and shook her head, heartache clear in her chocolate-brown eyes, so prominent it created a lump in my throat. “I know people used to call me names behind my back, but you were my familia, Jace… Familia don’t cut each other down, not like that.”

The pain in her voice dug the knife further into my chest. I automatically rubbed the area to try to ease the burn. I knew it wouldn’t be as simple as apologising. Jax was never a pushover. She stuck to her guns and got what she wanted out of every situation. I just didn’t know what else to do.

“I’mstillyour familia, sweetheart, and you’re mine. Always. And that’s why I can’t leave us like this,” I urged. “There’s too much brokenness and I want to fix it.Allof it.”

My gaze didn’t leave hers for a second while silently begging her to cave even just a little bit. Hell, I would fall to my knees and openly beg if she asked me to if that’s what it took. It meantthatmuch to me.

“You ran, Jace. You packed up and left town, then show back up thinking we can just go back to when we were younger?” A bitter laugh left her lips. “Not happening.”

Familiar frustration clamped around my lungs. It crept up my chest and threatened to spill out. I bit it all back down and forced composure into my tone.

“You ignored my calls. And I know damn well you were home each time I arrived at the house. This situation isn’t all because of me.”

Jax took a sip from her glass and arched one dark eyebrow. I knew that look; I was about to do something I wouldn’t enjoy. Defiance lit her expression as she glared down her nose.

“You know I don’t forgive easily. And that’s with people I don’t give a fuck about. Unfortunately for you, Jason, I actually give a fuck. Even though I don’t want to.”

I bit back a chuckle and disguised it as a scoff. Not forgiving easily was a goddamn understatement.

“It’sJace.And tell me, how do I fix this? Fixus.”

She shrugged. “At the moment, you don’t.” Her high heels clicked on the path as she made her way back toward the building.

“Stubborn goddamn woman,” I grumbled under my breath, then raised my voice in resignation. “Jax, wait.”

Her footsteps halted and crunched a pebble as she swivelled to face me. The way she lifted her chin and stood there in my jacket four sizes too big made me smile. My independent, defiant, and strong-willed pain in the ass was no one’s doormat.

I motioned for her to return to me with a flick of my hand, then I sat on top of the picnic table and tossed back the rest of my beer.

---