Page 126 of Feral

Had Daphne left with her colleagues? Had she begged them to take her as far away as possible from me?

I didn’t know and part of me didn’t want to find out.

She accepted me last night, welcomed me even. But this…this is different.

That’s what I told myself over and over again, but each time I believed it a little less. Was that the case? Was it possible that she could love me after seeing what I had become?

I winced at the hard knock on the door. Lowell had come back like I’d asked him, which meant she was gone. I would be needed outside; it was time to leave this room. But I couldn’t make my legs work no matter how much I tried. So I stayed on the floor, my back to the door as it creaked open.

“So she’s gone then?” I croaked.

“No,” said a soft, beautiful voice.

I couldn’t believe it. Had I become drunk and was hallucinating? Was I already so far gone that I was hearing things?

“I’m not going anywhere,” she said again, closer this time.

I turned slowly and looked up into her tear streaked face. Were those tears of fear, or something else? Why was she this close to me after what I’d done?

I shied away and Daphne was having none of it. She knelt beside me, lightly brushing against my fur but not touching me completely. She wiped the streaks off her face and shook her head.

“Why did you run from me?” she asked. “I could’ve helped you get cleaned up. I could’ve been here for you.”

I stared at her, unsure if I was hearing her right. Was she serious? Was this real? My mind spun on a blank space and I couldn’t find any words to answer her with. I must’ve sat there like an eejit for longer than I thought because she sighed and turned her wet eyes up at me.

“Say something,” she pleaded.

“How can ya stand me?”

The question was out before I could stop myself or think better of it. I didn’t want the answer, and yet I needed to hear what she’d say. I trembled as the fear hit me but I couldn’t look away from her. Now that she was before me, so close, I drank in the sight of her in case it was the last time I’d have it.

“What are you talking about?” she asked. “Stand you…are you serious? You saved my life! He was going to kill me.”

“I tore him to shreds,” the words were dragged out of my mouth and I cringed. “I was covered in…in blood. Ya saw me.”

Her hands suddenly on either side of my face made me gasp and I let her bring me near.

“I saw my mate after he’d protected me from a murderer. I saw how far you’re willing to go to protect me. I’m not afraid of you, Fraser. You’ve never made me feel unsafe. Quite the opposite really.”

The words were everything that I never let myself hope for. They were forgiveness, absolution. I lapped them up and still couldn’t quite quench my fear.

“This is who I am,” I said, my heart in my throat. “I try to control it, and I succeed most of the time but…when the people I love are threatened, I become this monster. It happened when Liam was hurt. It happened with …with …”

“Silvia?”

I closed my eyes as shame swept through me.

“I’m not her,” Daphne said, running her thumb across my cheek. “I know who you are, Fraser. I…I love who you are. Every piece of you.”

“Ya love me? Even after that?” I whispered.

“Of course I do! Fraser, do you really think that would be enough to make me run? I meant what I said last night in the garden. I love you.”

Everything snapped into focus at those words. The fog in my mind cleared and it was as if sunlight broke through the clouds.

“I love ya too. You’re…Daphne, you’re my true mate, the other half of my soul. I never want to be parted from ya, ever. I’ll follow ya wherever ya go, I’ll stand by yer side and be yer mate if you’ll let me.”

The words tumbled out, fast and rough. Even just last night the thought of speaking such things had unsettled me, mostly because I hadn’t wanted to frighten her. But now, with her one small confession, I found myself unable to hold it all back. I needed to stay with her, and I would do anything for that.

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