Page 101 of Feral

My ears rang with the adrenaline and animal instincts that had bathed my muscles in fire. A terrible baptism that I had only ever experienced during the full moon. And even then, I had never spilled blood like this before.

Finally, I didn’t know how long, Daphne’s keening screech pulled me from below the surface of the rage I’d been submerged in. In the back of my mind, I knew this wasn’t accurate. It had been Silvia on that day, not Daphne. But in the dream, it was all real. Only this time, I knew what was coming and it sliced at my heart like a hot knife.

“Daphne,” I said, lunging for her in desperation to make this time different.

She became a wild, unhinged thing. Scrambling back, kicking at me, clawing at the ground in an effort to get away from me. It was then that I saw my hand, claws shining with blood, fur matted with gore.

“Daphne,” I panted, “it’s alright. It’s me, Fraser. This is…this is just me. The real me. He was going to kill us. I had to save you. Please…”

“Stay away from me!”

She threw the bottle of champagne at me. Then the glasses, the food, the basket. When she ran out of things from the picnic, she resorted to rocks.

“Stay away!”

“Okay,” I stopped, tears flowing down my snout and cheeks. “I won’t hurt you. I swear. I love you, please, Daphne!”

“You’re a monster. Y-you murdered him with your bare hands! You touched me, fucked me with that…with those…! Oh my god.”

She promptly vomited on the ground.

I snagged the picnic blanket, which had somehow remained mostly blood free, and ran back to her with it.

“No…no!” she crawled from the sick on the ground. “You stay the fuck away from me, you freak!”

My heart froze and I came to halt. The fear and hate inher beautiful blue eyes, the way she clutched at another rock, ready to strike me with it if I moved a muscle.

This was the woman I was about to ask to be my mate, the one who said she loved me, wanted bairns with me. And she was looking at me with such raw revulsion. If she had skinned me alive, Daphne wouldn’t have been able to wound me more.

I fell to my knees on the blood soaked ground, the stain reaching out far more than it had in real life on that day. Daphne’s words echoed in my head, over and over. Until I raised my head and howled out my pain.

I woke with a start, the pain of Daphne’s rejection still burning inside my body. It took me more than a few minutes to recognize that she was sleeping in my arms, her hand tangled in the fur on my arm. She was breathtaking with the pale light of the sunrise casting her skin in gold. The scent of her soul uncoiled, calling me to sink back into the bed, to wind myself around her and forget the nightmare. But I couldn’t do it.

The memory of it was a sick taste on my brain, one I couldn’t stand one moment longer. I got up slowly, careful not wake her, and threw my kilt on. The house was quiet, but I could still hear her cries, her vicious words from the dream. I could still feel the blood cooling on my body, the sting of the rocks on my skin. Everything about it was real, driving away the perfect peace and love I’d known in Daphne’s arms tonight. She’d welcomed me as I was, trusted me with her body. The animal in me had come out more tonight than it ever had with another person. It had frightened me, until I saw the intense pleasure in Daphne’s cries, the way she looked at me with such pure affection.

I’d almost called it ‘love’. I’d wanted to, but didn’t dare, fearing the agony of getting my hopes up only to have them dashed again.

And now tonight, I’d seen my fears made manifest in my dreams. It was so real that I had a hard time believing it wasn’t true, that Daphne wasn’t going to wake up and run screaming from me.

I slumped against a wall near the kitchen and buried my face in my hands. Everything ached to go back and hold her. To wake her up with licks and nips to her beautiful body, to wring cries of pleasure from her slender throat and forget all about what I’d seen. But I couldn’t move, couldn’t think past the replay of those horrific images, over, and over in my mind.

The full moon affected all of us in different ways. Lowell’s usually high libido went into overdrive, but that was fine because there was always some female Weres that were more than happy to scratch that mutual itch with him.

Liam and Samuel seemed to be able to control their urges with long runs over the moonlit hillsides, the full moon giving Liam enough strength to temporarily overcome his injury.

Angus and I were the ones with the temper at this time, and that worked out fine. We’d usually beat the shite out of each another for three nights, and forget about it after. But this time was different, I could feel it in the way it burned through my veins and made rational thought impossible. Alongside the instinct to fight was the fire of lust coursing through me like a runaway train. What if my mating instincts were not strong enough to prevent me from hurting her? What if I took her too roughly, what if her request to stop didn’t get through soon enough and I did something unforgiveable?

No, I need to stay away from her today and tonight. That’s the only safe option.

“Fraser?” Liam asked, limping out of the kitchen. “What’s wrong?”

I shook my head.

“I shouldn’t have given in. She…she didn’t ken what I am, Liam. And with the full moon comin’…she’ll see. She’ll seemeand she’ll hate me, just like Silvia did.”

Liam’s hand landed heavy on my shoulder.

“No, brother. She is different, I can tell. She works around monsters, she’s used to all of this.”

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