Page 113 of Hate You Forever (Hate 1)

Imust be in an alternate reality. One where Marnix and I can be in the same room for an extended period of time without ripping each other apart, or one of us ending up with a stab wound.

I guess miracles do happen.

I didn’t realize how tense my body had been this last week. Even though Marnix and I seem to bring out the worst in each other, I couldn’t help but feel a weird sense of relief seeing him. The man drives me insane to the point of madness, but he also reminds me I’m safe from the monster I could be stuck with.

And who knew the man who acts like he’s king of the world could cook? Fuck, that was the best manicotti I’ve ever had in my life. Not that I eat it often, but still, it was mouth-watering.

Too bad I ran out of the room like a little bitch, otherwise I could’ve thanked him properly for the food. Deep down, I know it was the right choice. If I fall back into this same routine with Marnix, we’re just going to keep this toxic push and pull going between us. He would’ve eventually come to his senses and pushed me away yet again, so I took matters into my own hands.

The connection between us is hot; it sets my skin on fire anytime I’m near him. He does something to me that I can’t escape. It’s fucking invigorating. I crave him when he’s gone, but I want to push every single one of his buttons when he’s near.

The only thing I know is that my vagina is screaming at me for not giving into my desires. My lady blue balls are aching like crazy, wishing I’d have let Marnix have his way with me.

I’ve been lying awake on my bed for a couple of hours, replaying the events of the night. Wondering if I should go find Marnix and finish what he started. But I know I’m stronger than that—I know I can control myself and my pussy.

But can I really?

Sighing,I push myself up out of bed. I can’t sleep anyway; I might as well get up. My legs seem to have a mind of their own as I travel toward the door. I know exactly where I’ll find Marnix right now. He’ll be holed up in his office, working all night to avoid the exact same thing I’ve been trying to forget.

I sneak past a sleeping Rush on my couch. I don’t know what’s up with him tonight, but he insisted on crashing right outside my bedroom. I take one last look at him as I reach the door, and notice his phone still open on his chest. Multiple camera views are open on his screen. He must’ve been watching them when he drifted off to sleep.

Always my protector.

I slip out, quietly closing the door behind me. My feet hit the bottom of the stairs and I march toward Marnix’s office, ready to conquer him once and for all, but something stops me in my tracks.

The shiny blue water gleaming in through the large glass window calls to me. The pool is lit up, shining bright in the dark night. I step closer to the window, looking at the calm water. It just looks so peaceful and quiet out there.

“Can’t sleep?” A soft voice nearly makes me jump out of my skin as a yelp leaves me.

“Jesus, you scared me!” I clutch my hand to my chest, spinning around to see Mariana’s small frame standing right there.

“Sorry, I was in the kitchen and I thought I heard something,” she replies sweetly. I’m surprised she’s here this late. Since I’ve been living here, she’s been around a few times, but not as much as I’d expected. Or maybe she is and I’ve just been avoiding the common spaces as much as possible, to stay away from awkward confrontations.

“Don’t you know that’s how people die in serial killer movies?” I chuckle, but she looks nervous. “No, ah, that was supposed to be a joke. Clearly a terrible one.”

“No, you’re totally right. I’m a huge scary movie buff, and I didn’t even think of that. Never follow the noise and always turn on lights are rules that should be followed, and I did neither of those.” She laughs, shaking her head. Her dark brown hair is down for once, hanging around her shoulders. She looks younger like this, a lot more relaxed and less formal.

“What are you doing up so late?” I ask.

“Needed a late night snack before heading to bed. You want something?” She points in the direction of the kitchen, but I shake my head and smile softly.

“No, I’m good, thanks.”

“Okay well, if you change your mind, don’t be afraid to come get me.” She spins on her heels to walk toward her living quarters, but stops after a few steps. “Hey, Tara?”

“Yeah?”

“Marnix has been through a lot. Just be patient with him. He’ll come around eventually.”

“Will he?” I genuinely don’t know if that’s true. We are two complicated people who seem to have a hard time accepting and trusting each other.

“He will. I can tell by the way he looks at you. It’s different. You make him different. He has a tough exterior, but once he lets you in, you won’t regret it. He cares in his own way. He’s not like the rest of us,” she says confidently, like she’s in on some secret I don’t know.

“I’ll take your word for it.” It’s all I can say. I don’t think we’ll get there, but who knows.

“That’s all I ask.” She smiles, before turning and walking away. I’m left wondering what I'm supposed to do with that information.

What the hell am I doing?

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